I'm a Fool for You...Blogger

"Sucked into the super massive." ~Muse - Super Massive Black Hole


Blogger: Um…soooo…. *longish kind of short pause* Whatcha doin?

Me: *typing away on lappy* My writer’s block is gone, so *shrugging shoulders* I’m writing.

Blogger: Oh. *Another longish pause—a little awkward*

Me: *Still typing*

Blogger: So I haven’t seen you hanging out for a while... It’s like you fell off the internet. *uncomfortable laugh*

Me: *stopping, looking up at Blogger* I really want to get this revising done. I’m on a roll. It should only take me a few days to be caught up.

Blogger: *pursed lips, tone defensive (a little annoying)* You didn’t even say you were unplugging or anything. I mean…what’s up with that?

Me: I wasn’t planning on unplugging, it just kind of happened that way. *putting fingers back on keys, commencing the writing*

Another awkward pause, really…really…realllly long. Blogger looks a little fumed.


Blogger: Be honest. Are you breaking up with me?

Me: What? *surprised at Blogger’s concern…and honestly, a little perplexed*

Blogger: Is it my hair? I knew it! You hate my hair! *little sob*

Me: Ah….no... It’s not your hair. I promise. I’ve just been so busy with the writing that I kind of…haven’t been blogging.

Blogger: So you’re not breaking up with me?

Me: No you silly. I’m not breaking up with you. I’m just unofficially unplugged. I’m sorry I didn’t tell you sooner.

Blogger: So we’re okay then. *wiping away a single tear (for dramatic sake)*

Me: Yes, we are just fine. I’ll be back next week.

Blogger: Whew.

Me: So… *making a funny face, not realizing the strangeness of it all* You have hair? Interesting.

Sorry I haven’t been commenting lately my awesome bloggy best friends. My writer’s block has broken and I’m sucked into the super massive writing hole. I promise I’ll be back next week (or the week after…you know. If this writer’s block stays away.)

But before I run off to write, how do you guys deal with writers block? Be honest, do you talk to blogger when it happens?

Spray, Tug, Smooth, Hang to Dry

How do you feel about ironing? I am not a big fan of ironing, so I got a little excited when I saw something new in the detergent aisle at the grocery store. Well, it was new to me, but it may be old to you. I think it was called a wrinkle releaser. You spray it on your clothes (Hmmm, is that wet clothes, or dry clothes?) then you tug and smooth and let the article hang dry. Sounds great, doesn’t it. I was almost salivating, but then I wondered…Does it really work?

I’ve spent a lot of money over the years on stuff that was supposed to be fabulous, and really wasn’t, so I was a teeny bit suspicious about investing my $3.59 on an unproven product. Has anyone ever used this stuff? Does it work?

My second thought was, if it works…is it only for clothes? Is there a chance it could work on skin? Could I spray some on my face, then tug, smooth, and air dry. What a fun thought. No more crow’s feet. Smile lines begone. It’s a great idea, don’t you think.

And why stop there? I could use a little help ironing out the wrinkles in my life, couldn’t you? Family problems? Spray, tug, smooth, hang to dry. Personal problems? Spray, tug, smooth, hang-dry. Kids giving you grief? Spray, tug, smooth, hang…dry. Tempting isn’t it.

And what about that writing glitch? The plot that won’t plot? The dialogue that’s stuck? The never ending story? A wrinkle in time? You know what I’m talking about. You’ve been there. How’d you like some magic spray? Quick run to the grocery store and grab a bottle. Spray, tug, smooth, and hang to dry.

Linda Garner

P.S.
Scroll down to see me having breakfast with Erika Hansen. Erika Hansen is the former Miss Iron County. She entered the pageant on a platform of preventing sexual abuse. She is awesome. Read about her tomorrow, on my website blog at www.somesecretshurt.com.