Marketing is hard work. I've said it before. You've probably heard me. It's hard to know what's going to make a difference. Blogging? Facebook? Twitter? Book signings?
I don't make much money on my book, so it's not about money. It's about making a difference. Always has been. I've done all the above, but I also write articles. Getting them published hasn't always been easy. Like I said, Marketing is hard work.
A great lady named Susan Rogers runs a fabulous website on preventing sexual abuse. In fact she has tons of material on the subject and gives workshops. She likes my articles and has agreed to feature one each month.
Getting the message out there is super important. Getting my book noticed is terrific too. Do me a favor and check out Susan's website. It's called S.A.F.E. Network. She has some great information. Just click here. After all, keeping kids safe is everyone's job.
Like I said, Marketing is hard work.
Linda Garner
Showing posts with label sexual abuse. Show all posts
Showing posts with label sexual abuse. Show all posts
Tuesday, September 6, 2011
Tuesday, May 24, 2011
That looks like Dog Poop
Whew! Time for a Break.
Are you like me? When I get my head in my writing, nothing gets in my way. I can ignore the dirty dishes, the piles of laundry, and the crumbs on the floor. A tornado could by swishing around me and I might not notice.
I've been wrapped up on an article on sexual abuse for Your LDS Neighborhood. It's sort of a long story, but I promised them an article by a certain date and had to put them off a little because of my drowned computer. Now I'm really determined to make that article sparkle and get it in their hands before they need it.
The article is called In The Quiet Heart is Hidden Sorrow that the Eye Can't See. I know, it's a long title. It's scheduled to run on June 8, so go sign up for Your LDS Neighborhood if you aren't already. It's easy and it's free. No worries if you're not LDS. The articles are not usually religious. You can sign up here.
Just to whet your appetite here is the beginning of the article.
Orange jello. The girls were excited. My friend had made it for her mutual class. As she peeled back the foil, their delight turned quickly to dismay. Something was wrong.
“What’s that in the corner?” asked one of the girls. “It looks like dog poop.”
“It is dog poop,” said the teacher, “but don’t worry. It’s just in this one corner. We can cut around it. Who wants a piece?”
If you want to hear the rest of the story, go to Your LDS Neighborhood on June 8.
Linda Garner
Are you like me? When I get my head in my writing, nothing gets in my way. I can ignore the dirty dishes, the piles of laundry, and the crumbs on the floor. A tornado could by swishing around me and I might not notice.
I've been wrapped up on an article on sexual abuse for Your LDS Neighborhood. It's sort of a long story, but I promised them an article by a certain date and had to put them off a little because of my drowned computer. Now I'm really determined to make that article sparkle and get it in their hands before they need it.
The article is called In The Quiet Heart is Hidden Sorrow that the Eye Can't See. I know, it's a long title. It's scheduled to run on June 8, so go sign up for Your LDS Neighborhood if you aren't already. It's easy and it's free. No worries if you're not LDS. The articles are not usually religious. You can sign up here.
Just to whet your appetite here is the beginning of the article.
Orange jello. The girls were excited. My friend had made it for her mutual class. As she peeled back the foil, their delight turned quickly to dismay. Something was wrong.
“What’s that in the corner?” asked one of the girls. “It looks like dog poop.”
“It is dog poop,” said the teacher, “but don’t worry. It’s just in this one corner. We can cut around it. Who wants a piece?”
If you want to hear the rest of the story, go to Your LDS Neighborhood on June 8.
Linda Garner
Tuesday, April 12, 2011
Start Talking
April is Sexual Abuse Awareness Month and Child Abuse Prevention Month. No one really wants to talk about sexual abuse. We would rather pretend it isn't happening. However, if we want to protect kids, we need to start talking about it. Kids need to know what they're up against and how to fight back. Education is the key.
Sexual abuse is extremely damaging to kids and it is more prevelant than most people imagine. More than one in four girls in the U.S. today will be sexually abused before the age of eighteen. More than one in six boys today will be sexually abused before the age of eighteen. Some of that could prevented if kids were better prepared and if caring adults created relationships of trust where kids felt safe to talk about hard stuff.
What can you do?
1.Talk to the kids in your life about abuse. Be calm. Teach with clarity and avoid scare tactics. Remind kids that the only way to stop an abuser is to tell a trusted adult if someone tries to molest them.
2. Cultivate a trusting relationship. Talk to your kids about all kinds of things. Be a safe person for kids to talk to. Make it easy for your kids to come to you when they are worried or confused.
3. Copy the poster at the top of this post and pass it along. Email, facebook, twitter, whatever. Right click and copy or save. It's easy. Spread the word.
Click here for more detailed information. You can download a free Parents Guide and What To Do.
The only thing worse than finding out that your child has been sexually abused is not finding out.
Start Talking.
Linda Garner
Tuesday, March 29, 2011
No Contest or is there?
As April nears, I wonder what I can do to make a difference. April is Child Abuse Prevention Month and Sexual Abuse Awareness Month. Since writing Some Secrets Hurt, a book designed to prevent sexual abuse, I have found myself passionately involved in fighting child abuse of every kind. It’s an uphill road, especially with sexual abuse. Hardly anyone wants to talk about sexual abuse, at least not publicly. In private people will talk. I have heard many sad stories. Everyone has a story.
But publicly things are different. Many people want to look the other way and pretend it isn’t happening here. I encounter lots of roadblocks. I have a wonderful presentation for schools, but schools are very hesitant to open that can of worms. I have written some great articles. People have promised to publish them and then get cold feet and give me some lame excuse. It is discouraging.
My dream is to create a safer world for children everywhere. To do that, we need to start talking about sexual abuse. We need to be more open and give children and teenagers knowledge and tools to take control of their own bodies. This is the reason I wrote Some Secrets Hurt—to open the door to communication. I would love to see Some Secrets Hurt in the hands of families and children around the world.
Spreading the word is challenging, because it is a difficult subject. When I mention sexual abuse, some people feel threatened, others don’t understand the danger. For many, though, the danger is very real, because they have lived the nightmare. I do presentations and write articles to fill in the gaps between the limited promotion my publisher is able to do and what I feel needs to be done. At times it feels like I am fighting a losing battle. I can’t give up. This battle is too important. It’s not about book sales, it’s about children.
Please consider what you might do during the month of April to prevent child abuse. Your suggestions are welcome. I would love to hear what you have to say about preventing abuse.
I have considered hosting a contest which would encourage you to do some helpful things. I have received mixed reviews on my contest idea. Some of my author friends think contests are effective, other think not. I would love to know how you feel about it.
Do you like contests? Would you like to make a difference? How passionate are you about preventing sexual abuse? If I host a contest, are you likely to participate?
Linda Garner
I
But publicly things are different. Many people want to look the other way and pretend it isn’t happening here. I encounter lots of roadblocks. I have a wonderful presentation for schools, but schools are very hesitant to open that can of worms. I have written some great articles. People have promised to publish them and then get cold feet and give me some lame excuse. It is discouraging.
My dream is to create a safer world for children everywhere. To do that, we need to start talking about sexual abuse. We need to be more open and give children and teenagers knowledge and tools to take control of their own bodies. This is the reason I wrote Some Secrets Hurt—to open the door to communication. I would love to see Some Secrets Hurt in the hands of families and children around the world.
Spreading the word is challenging, because it is a difficult subject. When I mention sexual abuse, some people feel threatened, others don’t understand the danger. For many, though, the danger is very real, because they have lived the nightmare. I do presentations and write articles to fill in the gaps between the limited promotion my publisher is able to do and what I feel needs to be done. At times it feels like I am fighting a losing battle. I can’t give up. This battle is too important. It’s not about book sales, it’s about children.
Please consider what you might do during the month of April to prevent child abuse. Your suggestions are welcome. I would love to hear what you have to say about preventing abuse.
I have considered hosting a contest which would encourage you to do some helpful things. I have received mixed reviews on my contest idea. Some of my author friends think contests are effective, other think not. I would love to know how you feel about it.
Do you like contests? Would you like to make a difference? How passionate are you about preventing sexual abuse? If I host a contest, are you likely to participate?
Linda Garner
I
Tuesday, January 25, 2011
Forget All the Rules
Forget all the rules. Forget about being published. Write for yourself and celebrate writing. Melinda Haynes
Celebrate writing. What an awesome thought. I really do love to write.
Forget all the rules. When I first began to write, I had no idea what the rules were. I knew a little about grammar and I knew what sounded good to me on paper and what felt good on my tongue when I rolled words around inside my mouth. I’m learning every day, but I still write mostly from instinct.
In truth, I broke a lot of the publishing rules when I wrote Some Secrets Hurt. Some I broke on purpose, others accidentally. Maybe it goes without saying that writing about sexual abuse is taboo. Sexual abuse is a taboo subject. No one wants to talk about it. Let’s pretend it isn’t happening. Let’s ignore it and maybe it will go away. I knew that finding a publisher for sensitive material could be difficult, but I knew what I had to do. I had to write Some Secrets Hurt. It was calling to me.
Picture books are 32 pages. Almost always. Some Secrets Hurt is 64. That’s practically unheard of. That part I didn’t know. Now I not only had to find a publisher who would publish taboo material, but they had to publish it on 64 pages.
My illustrator hadn’t published a book either, so maybe she didn’t know about the 32 page rule. She could have made it 32 pages, but she made it 64. Each of her illustrations are so meaningful and so well matched to the text that 32 pages would have really diluted the impact of the book. Brandilyn went on her instincts too, which proved to be very powerful.
Illustrators are always chosen by the publisher. Always. Sending illustrations with the text to publishers is a big no no. Most publishers will not even look at author/illustrator combinations. I actually knew about this rule, but was drawn to Brandilyn. We had just met, and I knew she was right for the book. I knew it could hurt my chances of being published, but I had to go with my instincts.
I was concerned about finding a publisher who wouldn’t dilute my message. I was concerned that a publisher might want to sugar coat the message or water it down. I knew that the message was inspired. The text and the illustrations were inspired. I knew that Brandilyn and I had gotten it right. I didn’t want some publisher changing it up.
We were so blessed to connect with Shadow Mountain, and Chris Schoebinger who believed in the message and gave us a team of creative giants who brought the book to life. They didn’t change the message or the words. They loved the illustrations. They were true to our vision and they agreed to market the book very close to cost so that every family in America could afford to have this book in their home.
There was just one little problem. They didn’t have advertising dollars to spend on this book. Advertising sells books. There is only one way that this incredibly important book can change lives. That is if we can get it into the hands of those who need it most. Parents, children, families, teachers, and don’t forget teenagers.
Most people haven’t heard about Some Secrets Hurt. They don’t know that it can protect and empower the children we love. They don’t know that this little book can help to prevent sexual abuse. They don’t know that their children could be at risk. They don’t know that Some Secrets Hurt should be in every home.
How can we spread the word? Word of mouth. That’s how to do it. Please tell everyone you know about the little book with the big message. Some Secrets Hurt.
Do it Today.
Linda Garner
Celebrate writing. What an awesome thought. I really do love to write.
Forget all the rules. When I first began to write, I had no idea what the rules were. I knew a little about grammar and I knew what sounded good to me on paper and what felt good on my tongue when I rolled words around inside my mouth. I’m learning every day, but I still write mostly from instinct.
In truth, I broke a lot of the publishing rules when I wrote Some Secrets Hurt. Some I broke on purpose, others accidentally. Maybe it goes without saying that writing about sexual abuse is taboo. Sexual abuse is a taboo subject. No one wants to talk about it. Let’s pretend it isn’t happening. Let’s ignore it and maybe it will go away. I knew that finding a publisher for sensitive material could be difficult, but I knew what I had to do. I had to write Some Secrets Hurt. It was calling to me.
Picture books are 32 pages. Almost always. Some Secrets Hurt is 64. That’s practically unheard of. That part I didn’t know. Now I not only had to find a publisher who would publish taboo material, but they had to publish it on 64 pages.
My illustrator hadn’t published a book either, so maybe she didn’t know about the 32 page rule. She could have made it 32 pages, but she made it 64. Each of her illustrations are so meaningful and so well matched to the text that 32 pages would have really diluted the impact of the book. Brandilyn went on her instincts too, which proved to be very powerful.
Illustrators are always chosen by the publisher. Always. Sending illustrations with the text to publishers is a big no no. Most publishers will not even look at author/illustrator combinations. I actually knew about this rule, but was drawn to Brandilyn. We had just met, and I knew she was right for the book. I knew it could hurt my chances of being published, but I had to go with my instincts.
I was concerned about finding a publisher who wouldn’t dilute my message. I was concerned that a publisher might want to sugar coat the message or water it down. I knew that the message was inspired. The text and the illustrations were inspired. I knew that Brandilyn and I had gotten it right. I didn’t want some publisher changing it up.
We were so blessed to connect with Shadow Mountain, and Chris Schoebinger who believed in the message and gave us a team of creative giants who brought the book to life. They didn’t change the message or the words. They loved the illustrations. They were true to our vision and they agreed to market the book very close to cost so that every family in America could afford to have this book in their home.
There was just one little problem. They didn’t have advertising dollars to spend on this book. Advertising sells books. There is only one way that this incredibly important book can change lives. That is if we can get it into the hands of those who need it most. Parents, children, families, teachers, and don’t forget teenagers.
Most people haven’t heard about Some Secrets Hurt. They don’t know that it can protect and empower the children we love. They don’t know that this little book can help to prevent sexual abuse. They don’t know that their children could be at risk. They don’t know that Some Secrets Hurt should be in every home.
How can we spread the word? Word of mouth. That’s how to do it. Please tell everyone you know about the little book with the big message. Some Secrets Hurt.
Do it Today.
Linda Garner
Tuesday, January 19, 2010
Selected Neglect
Do you ever feel that there aren’t enough hours in the day? I do. Practically every day, as a matter of fact. Some days I really feel time challenged, and other days my energy gives out first.
Years ago, as a time challenged young mother, I first heard about selected neglect. A mother of many children was asked just how she managed. She said, “Simple. I operate on a system of selected neglect.” I found that idea exactly suited my needs and it helped me get through the maze of raising children. Now the children are gone, (well mostly), but I am still time challenged.
I started 2010 with an agenda of dejunking and organizing. I selectively neglected almost everything else. Next I decided to put a little more thought and planning into my piano practicing and teaching. Dejunking and organizing went to the back burner. My writing hasn’t been on the hit parade for a few days, and so today, I was on my computer at 5:00 a.m. doing a little catch up. Because of selected neglect, I was able to carve out some writing time.
I didn’t come up for air til about noon, and it was enough to start a new project, which I am excited about. It is difficult for me to write in snatches. I really prefer having big time slots to work with, but the reality is that seldom happens. So I am looking for suggestions on how to use those mini-moments to make strides in my writing. Tell me how you do it? What works for you?
And while I am admitting to being (gasp) time challenged, I would like to share with you my writing goals for January. That will help me be more accountable.
1. Submit two picture book manuscripts to a publisher. The manuscripts are finished, they just need submitting. The titles are Grudge Rock and A Jar of Love.
2. Finish my chapter book version of Way to Go Grace. It’s about half done. The picture book version of Way to Go Grace has been in the hands of a publisher for a very long time. I’m not worried about it. I figure the longer they hold on to it, the more seriously they are considering it.
3. Write a chapter a week on my new project. This is something special and new.
4. Schedule at least four Some Secrets Hurt presentations in elementary schools, for February.
I am on a roll with 1, 2, and 3. Number 4 has become a little sticky. First, my publishers told me they would arrange for my school visits. They ran into opposition and dropped the ball. They invited me to pick it up. I, too, am experiencing a few roadblocks. Principals are reluctant to open this can of worms. They know the statistics and understand that kids are at risk, but I think they are afraid of the fall-out.
I’m not giving up easily. This is such important work. There is nothing threatening about Some Secrets Hurt, and there is nothing threatening about my presentation. I feel that we owe our kids the opportunity to say no, the opportunity to tell, and the opportunity to grow up in a safe environment. Education is the key.
If you agree with me, how about calling your child’s principal, and suggesting a presentation for your school? My presentation is great for kids of all ages. I love doing presentations for parents and women’s groups as well.
I have been invited twice to share my presentation with High School Students, who have loved it. Would you have guessed that high school students would be interested in a picture book? What do they know that we don’t know?
What are your goals for January? What do you do when you’re in a time crunch? And (drum roll please) the question everyone wants to know: Do you operate on a system of selected neglect?
Linda Garner
P.S.
If you haven’t heard, Some Secrets Hurts was written to prevent sexual abuse, by empowering children and teenagers to take control of their own bodies. Feel free to visit my website, www.somesecretshurt.com.
Years ago, as a time challenged young mother, I first heard about selected neglect. A mother of many children was asked just how she managed. She said, “Simple. I operate on a system of selected neglect.” I found that idea exactly suited my needs and it helped me get through the maze of raising children. Now the children are gone, (well mostly), but I am still time challenged.
I started 2010 with an agenda of dejunking and organizing. I selectively neglected almost everything else. Next I decided to put a little more thought and planning into my piano practicing and teaching. Dejunking and organizing went to the back burner. My writing hasn’t been on the hit parade for a few days, and so today, I was on my computer at 5:00 a.m. doing a little catch up. Because of selected neglect, I was able to carve out some writing time.
I didn’t come up for air til about noon, and it was enough to start a new project, which I am excited about. It is difficult for me to write in snatches. I really prefer having big time slots to work with, but the reality is that seldom happens. So I am looking for suggestions on how to use those mini-moments to make strides in my writing. Tell me how you do it? What works for you?
And while I am admitting to being (gasp) time challenged, I would like to share with you my writing goals for January. That will help me be more accountable.
1. Submit two picture book manuscripts to a publisher. The manuscripts are finished, they just need submitting. The titles are Grudge Rock and A Jar of Love.
2. Finish my chapter book version of Way to Go Grace. It’s about half done. The picture book version of Way to Go Grace has been in the hands of a publisher for a very long time. I’m not worried about it. I figure the longer they hold on to it, the more seriously they are considering it.
3. Write a chapter a week on my new project. This is something special and new.
4. Schedule at least four Some Secrets Hurt presentations in elementary schools, for February.
I am on a roll with 1, 2, and 3. Number 4 has become a little sticky. First, my publishers told me they would arrange for my school visits. They ran into opposition and dropped the ball. They invited me to pick it up. I, too, am experiencing a few roadblocks. Principals are reluctant to open this can of worms. They know the statistics and understand that kids are at risk, but I think they are afraid of the fall-out.
I’m not giving up easily. This is such important work. There is nothing threatening about Some Secrets Hurt, and there is nothing threatening about my presentation. I feel that we owe our kids the opportunity to say no, the opportunity to tell, and the opportunity to grow up in a safe environment. Education is the key.
If you agree with me, how about calling your child’s principal, and suggesting a presentation for your school? My presentation is great for kids of all ages. I love doing presentations for parents and women’s groups as well.
I have been invited twice to share my presentation with High School Students, who have loved it. Would you have guessed that high school students would be interested in a picture book? What do they know that we don’t know?
What are your goals for January? What do you do when you’re in a time crunch? And (drum roll please) the question everyone wants to know: Do you operate on a system of selected neglect?
Linda Garner
P.S.
If you haven’t heard, Some Secrets Hurts was written to prevent sexual abuse, by empowering children and teenagers to take control of their own bodies. Feel free to visit my website, www.somesecretshurt.com.
Tuesday, November 24, 2009
Two Hands
I have loved all the great posts and thoughts on gratitude during the past few weeks. This is a great time to reflect on our blessings and choose to be grateful. It’s also a wonderful time to reach out. I hope that you will join me tonight with the Teddy Bear Ladies to reach out to abused children. You can make a difference. You can do it today. All you need is two hands and an hour or two.
The Teddy Bear Ladies meet the 4th Tuesday of every month to make bears for abused children. If you follow my blog on www.somesecretshurt.com you have read about them. They make 50 bears each month for the Children’s Justice Center in Provo. The Children’s Justice Center helps abused children. Most of the children they see have been sexually abused. They offer counseling and medical services for abused children, and everyone gets a bear. The Teddy Bear Ladies have been making bears for 18 years.
The T.B. Ladies meet tonight and they need to make 100 bears, so that they can take December off. Let’s give them a hand. They need our help, and we need a chance to make a difference.
You can show up tonight anytime from 3:00-9:00 and stay as long as you like. The Ladies meet at the Rock Creek Church at 2445 N. 650 E. in Provo. It’s right next to the Rock Creek Elementary School. Park in the back and join the bearmakers in the Relief Society Room.
You know the saying, Many hands make light work. The Teddy Bear Ladies could use your hands. Want to make a difference? How about today. I'll bring my hands. I'd love to see you there.
Linda Garner
P.S.
If you can't come, but would like to donate fabric or cash, call Ruth Brasier at 801-374-9482. If you can't come but would like to sew some bears, give Ruth a call. See you there.
The Teddy Bear Ladies meet the 4th Tuesday of every month to make bears for abused children. If you follow my blog on www.somesecretshurt.com you have read about them. They make 50 bears each month for the Children’s Justice Center in Provo. The Children’s Justice Center helps abused children. Most of the children they see have been sexually abused. They offer counseling and medical services for abused children, and everyone gets a bear. The Teddy Bear Ladies have been making bears for 18 years.
The T.B. Ladies meet tonight and they need to make 100 bears, so that they can take December off. Let’s give them a hand. They need our help, and we need a chance to make a difference.
You can show up tonight anytime from 3:00-9:00 and stay as long as you like. The Ladies meet at the Rock Creek Church at 2445 N. 650 E. in Provo. It’s right next to the Rock Creek Elementary School. Park in the back and join the bearmakers in the Relief Society Room.
You know the saying, Many hands make light work. The Teddy Bear Ladies could use your hands. Want to make a difference? How about today. I'll bring my hands. I'd love to see you there.
Linda Garner
P.S.
If you can't come, but would like to donate fabric or cash, call Ruth Brasier at 801-374-9482. If you can't come but would like to sew some bears, give Ruth a call. See you there.
Tuesday, November 10, 2009
Not About Elephants
Bobby: "Psssst. Don't tell anyone. It's our secret! There's an elephant in the living room, but we're pretending it's not really there and it's not really an elephant."
Billy: "But it smells and it's enormous!"
Bobby: "Just ignore it. Maybe it will go away."
Sounds pretty silly, doesn't it? Ignoring an elephant in the living room. How could anyone ignore an elephant in the living room?
Just think for a minute what it would be like. An elephant would take up most of the room. It would be difficult to watch TV, look out the windows, or see each other. Carrying on a conversation with an elephant in the living room would be tricky. And think what an elephant could do to the carpet.
How can you think of much else except how to clean up the mess the elephant makes? What do you do when company comes...put a doily on it? How can you even talk on the phone when there's an elephant trumpeting in the living room? And how do you convince the children, your friends, your family, and yourself there's not an elephant there?
Okay, so no sane person would keep an elephant in their living room.
The dialog about the elephant in the living room was written about alcoholism, but alcoholism isn't the only elephant, is it? An elephant in the living room is any problem that we don't want to talk about. It's the thing that we pretend isn't real, that we hide in corners and we sweep under the rug.
I chose to write a book about an elephant. My elephant is called sexual abuse.
This is the way I began my keynote address to the students who attended Wending Words, Journeying Toward Meaning. It was a great attention getter, and it set the stage for my topic, writing about a sensitive subject. I was able to share with the students my journey to publishing Some Secrets Hurt and why I write about sensitive subjects. I write to make a difference.
I shared with the kids my TV interview, we read my book together, and we talked about the statistics. As you may know, current stats indicate that one in four girls and one in six boys will be sexually abused before the age of eighteen. This is shocking for most people to hear, but the kids never batted an eye. What do they know that we don't know?
We talked about what those numbers might represent in their individual high schools. Given the stats, everyone knows someone who has been sexually abused. One third of those who have been abused will never tell anyone. I asked the students what they could do to help someone who has been abused, especially if they don't know for sure. I suggested that we all could be a little kinder to everyone we meet, especially the ones who don't seem to fit in. What if the reason they don't fit in is because they are carrying a secret; a secret shame, a secret hurt, a secret that has shattered their self-esteem? Some Secrets Hurt.
I talked about some of my favorite illustrations in the book, and showed them how Brandilyn brought Maggie to life. I told the students how Brandilyn and I met and shared our passion for making a difference. I highlighted some of the important ideas presented in the book: Sexual abuse is never the victim's fault. Teenagers as well as children are targets for sexual abuse. Abusers are rarely strangers. Whether you are a child or a teenager, you need help to stop the abuse. The only way to get help is to tell an adult that you trust. If the adult you tell does not believe you, or does not help you, talk to someone else. Keep telling until you find someone who helps you. You can heal if you get help. It's really hard on your own.
I told the young writers that point of view is a writer's secret weapon. Point of view is what allows us to get into a character's head and understand what he or she is feeling and thinking. Maggie is what makes Some Secrets Hurt real. She softens a difficult message. We identify with her. We cheer for her. We want her to tell. We want her to get help. We hope her parents will believe her. Maggie is my hero.
If you want to write about an elephant, it is important that you
1. Believe in your elephant. How big is your passion? Is your passion as big as your elephant?
2. Know your facts. This helps you to tell the truth and be convincing.
3. Create a believable character and allow them to tell your story. You can talk about anything, if you do it in a character's voice. Get inside your character's head.
When I wrote Some Secrets Hurt, I wanted to give children and teenagers a voice. I wanted to give parents a tool. I wanted a book that was simple enough for young children, yet meaningful enough for teenagers. I wanted to write a book that was informative enough for parents and teachers, yet powerful enough to promote healing for victims of all ages. How could I write a book that would cross age boundaries, gender boundaries, cultural and religious boundaries?
This would have been a difficult task if I had tried to do it alone, but I had help. I had help from a little girl named Maggie.
Linda Garner
P.S.
If you would like to read about my closing address, Making a Difference, visit http://www.somesecretshurt.com/ tomorrow.
Billy: "But it smells and it's enormous!"
Bobby: "Just ignore it. Maybe it will go away."
Sounds pretty silly, doesn't it? Ignoring an elephant in the living room. How could anyone ignore an elephant in the living room?
Just think for a minute what it would be like. An elephant would take up most of the room. It would be difficult to watch TV, look out the windows, or see each other. Carrying on a conversation with an elephant in the living room would be tricky. And think what an elephant could do to the carpet.
How can you think of much else except how to clean up the mess the elephant makes? What do you do when company comes...put a doily on it? How can you even talk on the phone when there's an elephant trumpeting in the living room? And how do you convince the children, your friends, your family, and yourself there's not an elephant there?
Okay, so no sane person would keep an elephant in their living room.
The dialog about the elephant in the living room was written about alcoholism, but alcoholism isn't the only elephant, is it? An elephant in the living room is any problem that we don't want to talk about. It's the thing that we pretend isn't real, that we hide in corners and we sweep under the rug.
I chose to write a book about an elephant. My elephant is called sexual abuse.
This is the way I began my keynote address to the students who attended Wending Words, Journeying Toward Meaning. It was a great attention getter, and it set the stage for my topic, writing about a sensitive subject. I was able to share with the students my journey to publishing Some Secrets Hurt and why I write about sensitive subjects. I write to make a difference.
I shared with the kids my TV interview, we read my book together, and we talked about the statistics. As you may know, current stats indicate that one in four girls and one in six boys will be sexually abused before the age of eighteen. This is shocking for most people to hear, but the kids never batted an eye. What do they know that we don't know?
We talked about what those numbers might represent in their individual high schools. Given the stats, everyone knows someone who has been sexually abused. One third of those who have been abused will never tell anyone. I asked the students what they could do to help someone who has been abused, especially if they don't know for sure. I suggested that we all could be a little kinder to everyone we meet, especially the ones who don't seem to fit in. What if the reason they don't fit in is because they are carrying a secret; a secret shame, a secret hurt, a secret that has shattered their self-esteem? Some Secrets Hurt.
I talked about some of my favorite illustrations in the book, and showed them how Brandilyn brought Maggie to life. I told the students how Brandilyn and I met and shared our passion for making a difference. I highlighted some of the important ideas presented in the book: Sexual abuse is never the victim's fault. Teenagers as well as children are targets for sexual abuse. Abusers are rarely strangers. Whether you are a child or a teenager, you need help to stop the abuse. The only way to get help is to tell an adult that you trust. If the adult you tell does not believe you, or does not help you, talk to someone else. Keep telling until you find someone who helps you. You can heal if you get help. It's really hard on your own.
I told the young writers that point of view is a writer's secret weapon. Point of view is what allows us to get into a character's head and understand what he or she is feeling and thinking. Maggie is what makes Some Secrets Hurt real. She softens a difficult message. We identify with her. We cheer for her. We want her to tell. We want her to get help. We hope her parents will believe her. Maggie is my hero.
If you want to write about an elephant, it is important that you
1. Believe in your elephant. How big is your passion? Is your passion as big as your elephant?
2. Know your facts. This helps you to tell the truth and be convincing.
3. Create a believable character and allow them to tell your story. You can talk about anything, if you do it in a character's voice. Get inside your character's head.
When I wrote Some Secrets Hurt, I wanted to give children and teenagers a voice. I wanted to give parents a tool. I wanted a book that was simple enough for young children, yet meaningful enough for teenagers. I wanted to write a book that was informative enough for parents and teachers, yet powerful enough to promote healing for victims of all ages. How could I write a book that would cross age boundaries, gender boundaries, cultural and religious boundaries?
This would have been a difficult task if I had tried to do it alone, but I had help. I had help from a little girl named Maggie.
Linda Garner
P.S.
If you would like to read about my closing address, Making a Difference, visit http://www.somesecretshurt.com/ tomorrow.
Tuesday, October 27, 2009
How Do You Organize A Walk-a-Thon ?
I need to pick your brain. April is Sexual Abuse Awareness month and Child Abuse Prevention month. I have never personally seen an event organized arount this theme, and I think it would be wonderful to have a walk-a-thon next April. That's just six months away, and I think it would be smart to get started right now.
Where do I start? Who do I call? Where should it be? Who could we involve? What are the costs? How do we choose a date? How can we publicize it? Who? What? Where? When? How? So many questions. Do you have the answers? Do you have ideas? Do you want to help? This could be big.
I have a vision of lots of people coming together to show their support and love for children, for innocence, for decency. I see us showing up for teenagers, and kids of all ages, and helping them to have a voice. I see kids and teenagers joining the walk, joining the fight against sexual abuse. I see men and women, boys and girls, people of all ages, religions, and cultures, showing up and making a difference. I see a community of caring people standing together and saying enough is enough.
Education is the key. Awareness is where it starts.
Would you come? Would you walk? Would you help? Would you?
Linda Garner
P.S.
See the amazing sculptures of Nick Ryan at www.somesecretshurt.com. These are quarter sized models that are for the future Monument to Healing, called A Healing Place. I would love to hear what you think about the sculptures and the plans for this beautiful place.
Where do I start? Who do I call? Where should it be? Who could we involve? What are the costs? How do we choose a date? How can we publicize it? Who? What? Where? When? How? So many questions. Do you have the answers? Do you have ideas? Do you want to help? This could be big.
I have a vision of lots of people coming together to show their support and love for children, for innocence, for decency. I see us showing up for teenagers, and kids of all ages, and helping them to have a voice. I see kids and teenagers joining the walk, joining the fight against sexual abuse. I see men and women, boys and girls, people of all ages, religions, and cultures, showing up and making a difference. I see a community of caring people standing together and saying enough is enough.
Education is the key. Awareness is where it starts.
Would you come? Would you walk? Would you help? Would you?
Linda Garner
P.S.
See the amazing sculptures of Nick Ryan at www.somesecretshurt.com. These are quarter sized models that are for the future Monument to Healing, called A Healing Place. I would love to hear what you think about the sculptures and the plans for this beautiful place.
Tuesday, September 15, 2009
Today!
Today is the day I get to start talking to parents about sexual abuse. Today is the day I get to empower kids to honor and respect their bodies. Today is the day that I tell parents to teach their kids about sexual touching and to tell them that no one has the right to touch them in this way.
Today is the day that I tell parents that the only thing worse than finding out that your child has been sexually abused, is not finding out. Today is the day that I ask parents to be a safe harbor for their kids, to be there for them, to stand up for them, and to be a safe person for them to talk to.
Today is the day that I tell parents that the best time for kids to hear this information is before they experience abuse. Today is the day that I tell them that the best day to start is today. Today is the day that I ask them to talk to their kids, whether they are boys or girls, teenagers or toddlers. Today is the best day to start.
Today is the day that I offer parents a tool and children a voice. Today I will be talking about Some Secrets Hurt on Studio 5. It airs at 11:00 a.m., on KSL (channel 5).
I hope you'll be watching. And, if today is not a good day for you, how about tomorrow. The Studio 5 segment will be available on my website, www.somesecretshurt.com, later this week.
Linda Garner
Today is the day that I tell parents that the only thing worse than finding out that your child has been sexually abused, is not finding out. Today is the day that I ask parents to be a safe harbor for their kids, to be there for them, to stand up for them, and to be a safe person for them to talk to.
Today is the day that I tell parents that the best time for kids to hear this information is before they experience abuse. Today is the day that I tell them that the best day to start is today. Today is the day that I ask them to talk to their kids, whether they are boys or girls, teenagers or toddlers. Today is the best day to start.
Today is the day that I offer parents a tool and children a voice. Today I will be talking about Some Secrets Hurt on Studio 5. It airs at 11:00 a.m., on KSL (channel 5).
I hope you'll be watching. And, if today is not a good day for you, how about tomorrow. The Studio 5 segment will be available on my website, www.somesecretshurt.com, later this week.
Linda Garner
Monday, September 14, 2009
Set Your TiVo
It's not my day to blog, but some of you asked for a reminder, so...here it is. The day is tomorrow. I will be on Studio 5, tomorrow. (That's Tuesday, September 15.) The show airs at 11:00 a.m. on KSL which is channel 5. Watch if you can, or Tivo (that's probably not how you spell it...sorry) it. And if all else fails you can catch it on www.somesecretshurt.com in a day or two.
I'm very excited, and just a little scared. Please send lots of happy thoughts and positive energy my way. We're all connected, and we can support each other, even when we're not together.
The segment will be really short, but it's a start. Let's all start standing up for kids. Keeping kids safe is everyone's job. Let's spread the word.
Linda Garner
I'm very excited, and just a little scared. Please send lots of happy thoughts and positive energy my way. We're all connected, and we can support each other, even when we're not together.
The segment will be really short, but it's a start. Let's all start standing up for kids. Keeping kids safe is everyone's job. Let's spread the word.
Linda Garner
Tuesday, September 8, 2009
Studio 5: Can you believe it?
Can you believe it? I am going to be on Studio 5. One week from today on September 15 at 11:00, I will be on the air. Have you seen Studio 5? It’s a neat show with lots of features about current trends and new ideas. I am so excited to be able to share Some Secrets Hurt on such a great show. Spread the word.
Am I nervous? That’s what everyone wants to know. Should I be? I am not the least bit nervous about my message. I love talking to people about Some Secrets Hurt. I love talking about protecting kids and empowering them to take control of their own bodies. I love giving parents tools so that they can talk to their kids about sexual abuse. I love getting teachers and other adults on board. Keeping kids safe is everyone’s job. I envision a caring community that is committed to kids and works together to protect them.
So, I think I’m not nervous. On the other hand, though, I am a little bit OCD about what to wear. Does this make me look fat? Is this color good on me? Should I wear dressy or casual? I have been spending a lot of time (and money) at Christopher Banks, my favorite store, and I have been experimenting with my hair and makeup. I changed to brown mascara like that Dressing Your Truth lady said I should, and I tried some of her very expensive products, so that I could look good.
I know that this is not about me, or my clothes and hair; it’s about the message. I just want to be a good messenger.
This is not my message; this is Heavenly Father’s message. He wants Some Secrets Hurt in every home where it can make a difference. He wants adults everywhere to teach kids about the sacredness of their bodies. He wants them to be able to stand up for themselves. He wants us to teach them how to say no. He wants us to stop abuse from happening so that his kids can heal. He wants us to stop the epidemic and be part of the solution. He wants us to reach out to teenagers who are at risk, and to wounded adults who don’t know how to heal.
I am honored to be a voice for children. I am not afraid to talk about sexual abuse. I am not nervous about teaching truth. I am excited to represent kids on T.V. I just want to look good, so that I can represent them well.
Hey, what are you doing later today? How about coming over and helping me figure out what to wear? We could experiment with my hair, and you could tell me if my new makeup looks orange. We could even talk about making a difference for kids.
Be sure to watch Studio 5 next Tuesday at 11:00 on KSL. If you can’t watch it, maybe you can record it. There is strength in numbers. Though we won’t be in the same room, I’m sure I’ll feel your strength. Together, we can make a difference.
Linda Garner
Am I nervous? That’s what everyone wants to know. Should I be? I am not the least bit nervous about my message. I love talking to people about Some Secrets Hurt. I love talking about protecting kids and empowering them to take control of their own bodies. I love giving parents tools so that they can talk to their kids about sexual abuse. I love getting teachers and other adults on board. Keeping kids safe is everyone’s job. I envision a caring community that is committed to kids and works together to protect them.
So, I think I’m not nervous. On the other hand, though, I am a little bit OCD about what to wear. Does this make me look fat? Is this color good on me? Should I wear dressy or casual? I have been spending a lot of time (and money) at Christopher Banks, my favorite store, and I have been experimenting with my hair and makeup. I changed to brown mascara like that Dressing Your Truth lady said I should, and I tried some of her very expensive products, so that I could look good.
I know that this is not about me, or my clothes and hair; it’s about the message. I just want to be a good messenger.
This is not my message; this is Heavenly Father’s message. He wants Some Secrets Hurt in every home where it can make a difference. He wants adults everywhere to teach kids about the sacredness of their bodies. He wants them to be able to stand up for themselves. He wants us to teach them how to say no. He wants us to stop abuse from happening so that his kids can heal. He wants us to stop the epidemic and be part of the solution. He wants us to reach out to teenagers who are at risk, and to wounded adults who don’t know how to heal.
I am honored to be a voice for children. I am not afraid to talk about sexual abuse. I am not nervous about teaching truth. I am excited to represent kids on T.V. I just want to look good, so that I can represent them well.
Hey, what are you doing later today? How about coming over and helping me figure out what to wear? We could experiment with my hair, and you could tell me if my new makeup looks orange. We could even talk about making a difference for kids.
Be sure to watch Studio 5 next Tuesday at 11:00 on KSL. If you can’t watch it, maybe you can record it. There is strength in numbers. Though we won’t be in the same room, I’m sure I’ll feel your strength. Together, we can make a difference.
Linda Garner
Tuesday, September 1, 2009
Breakfast with Erika Hansen
Here I am having breakfast with Erika Hansen. Erika was Miss Iron County until a few weeks ago. She has an amazing story. Get the scoop tomorrow on somesecretshurt.com
Tuesday, August 25, 2009
www.somesecretshurt.com
Unbelievable. It was my name. Linda Garner. My name was hanging from the ceiling on a placard, right next to Brandilyn’s. Brandilyn Speth. Could it be real? I had been waiting for this day. Now it was here. I was in the BYU Bookstore, standing under physical evidence that my book was a reality. Some Secrets Hurt was on the shelves waiting to be placed in the hands of those who need it most. Children. Parents. Families.
I wasn’t the tinyest bit nervous, but I was a little awe-struck. I couldn’t wait to start talking to people about my important book. I want my book to make a difference. I want it in every home. I arrived early to set up what I hoped was an eye-catching display and to strategically place my cinnamon bears…and my chocolate covered cinnamon bears. Can it get better than that?
I talked to other authors at the book signing earlier. “Brutal,” they said. “People are in a rush. They don’t stop to talk…or look.” I was prepared for the worst. “Still, it’s good exposure,” they said. The moment of truth arrived. We didn’t just sit at our table and wait. We mingled. We handed out cards. People were in a rush, but they did stop to talk, and they loved our book. They loved our book. I think the bookstore was surprised when we nearly sold out. Only two copies were left after the book signing. Only one copy was left at the end of the week.
Word of mouth. That’s our advertising for now. Shadow Mountain is holding off for the official release date. Then they’ll uncork all their magic. For now, though, we’re depending on you to spread the word. Please tell all your friends about this special and important book. You can get it today at any Seagull Book or Deseret Book Store. You can get it online at DeseretBook.com, Amazon.com, or BarnesandNoble.com. You just might be able to get it at BYU Bookstore, if you hurry.
And, drumroll please.... please visit our brand new website http://www.somesecretshurt.com/ . It is beautiful and has lots of helpful information. Brandilyn and I will both blog on the new site. We will blog about the fight against sexual abuse. Won’t you join us in that fight. We hope you will. Keeping kids safe is everyone’s job.
Linda Garner
I wasn’t the tinyest bit nervous, but I was a little awe-struck. I couldn’t wait to start talking to people about my important book. I want my book to make a difference. I want it in every home. I arrived early to set up what I hoped was an eye-catching display and to strategically place my cinnamon bears…and my chocolate covered cinnamon bears. Can it get better than that?
I talked to other authors at the book signing earlier. “Brutal,” they said. “People are in a rush. They don’t stop to talk…or look.” I was prepared for the worst. “Still, it’s good exposure,” they said. The moment of truth arrived. We didn’t just sit at our table and wait. We mingled. We handed out cards. People were in a rush, but they did stop to talk, and they loved our book. They loved our book. I think the bookstore was surprised when we nearly sold out. Only two copies were left after the book signing. Only one copy was left at the end of the week.
Word of mouth. That’s our advertising for now. Shadow Mountain is holding off for the official release date. Then they’ll uncork all their magic. For now, though, we’re depending on you to spread the word. Please tell all your friends about this special and important book. You can get it today at any Seagull Book or Deseret Book Store. You can get it online at DeseretBook.com, Amazon.com, or BarnesandNoble.com. You just might be able to get it at BYU Bookstore, if you hurry.
And, drumroll please.... please visit our brand new website http://www.somesecretshurt.com/ . It is beautiful and has lots of helpful information. Brandilyn and I will both blog on the new site. We will blog about the fight against sexual abuse. Won’t you join us in that fight. We hope you will. Keeping kids safe is everyone’s job.
Linda Garner
Tuesday, July 28, 2009
A Big Surprise!
Brandilyn and I got a big surprise last Saturday. My son called and asked if I knew my book was out. “Of course not,” I said. “It won’t be out until September 16.”“I know that’s what you’ve told us,” said Nate, “but it is out. It is on the shelves at Deseret Book, and it is available at deseretbook.com.”
“Are you sure?” I asked.
“Positive,” he said.
Well, you can imagine what happened next. I made a flying trip to Deseret Book and found that Some Secrets Hurt is indeed on the shelves. Next we checked websites. Besides deseretbook.com, we found it available on barnesandnoble.com. Amazon.com and borders.com have it available for preorder with the September release date. BYU Bookstore has it on their shelves, but not on their website.
I called the local Barnes and Noble to see if they have it in stock. “Not yet,” I heard, “but we can order it in.” The South Town Barnes and Noble has ordered one. It will be here Friday. You could be the one to get that book.
Curiosity got the better of me, so I asked my Shadow Mountain friends, “what’s up with that?” Of course I am crazy with delight, to see my book on store shelves, but how did it happen, and when does the publicity start?
It seems the book was ready early and Deseret Book was already shipping early for Education Week, so they decided to ship early to their stores as well. The publicity will wait for the official September 16 release date, but in the meantime Some Secrets Hurt is on store shelves now.
Why wait? Get your copy today. Today is the perfect day to share it with someone you love. Remember that keeping kids safe is everyone’s job.
Linda Garner
Tuesday, July 21, 2009
Hot Off the Press
Some Secrets Hurt is hot off the press. Though it will not be released until September, the printing is done and the copies are beautiful. I can't wait for it to be in the hands of children everywhere where it can make a difference.
Here are some photos of my grandkids looking at Some Secrets Hurt. Kids are the reason I wrote Some Secrets Hurt. I wrote it to keep them safe.
Some Secrets Hurt is not just for girls and it is not just for small children. It is for boys and girls of all ages.
Some Secrets Hurt is a great tool for parents, teachers, aunts, uncles, friends, neighbors, and anyone who cares about kids. We all want to keep kids safe, but aren't always sure how to make it happen.
I'm excited for you to see it too. If you can't wait until September to get your copy, I have great news. There will be an early release at BYU Education Week in August. That's right, you can get a copy at BYU Bookstore during the week of August 17-21. Brandilyn and I will be available sometime during the week to sign your copy. We'd love to see you there. Watch the blog for details. Tell your friends.
See you there.
Linda Garner
Wednesday, July 1, 2009
Maggie's T-Shirt
Great News! The first copies of Some Secrets Hurt are hot off the press. I hope to have one in my hands very soon. I have been told that they look great. Can’t wait to see them.
Thanks to everyone who responded to my t-shirt blog last week. I have pitched this idea to Shadow Mountain, but they have not responded. They are interested in seeing the feedback that is generated from my blog.
Sixty people viewed my blog last Tuesday. Fifteen responded. Four responded directly on the blogsite. Eleven responded to my personal email. Six people indicated that they would wear the t-shirt. Six people said they would buy the book, and didn’t say whether they would wear the t-shirt. Three people said they would not wear the t-shirt. One of those three intends to buy the book. The other two didn't say. Fourteen responders were female. One responder was male.
One person suggested a different idea for the t-shirt and said that Stand Up For Kids was too general. This person suggested a different caption and a different picture. Maggie is the main character in Some Secrets Hurt. In the book Maggie is being abused and she finds the courage to tell. The suggestion is to feature Maggie on the t-shirt and have the caption read Maggie Has a Secret and There is Only One Thing to Do. The back would read Maggie Must Tell. These are quotes from the book. As you might guess, this responder has seen the book.
No one sent their name to be included on the t-shirt. I must admit I am surprised. Since we would only use first names, I felt this would be totally non-threatening. I feel that we are offering abuse victims a chance to fight back in a safe environment.
I love the t-shirt idea. I think it would be great to have bookstore employees wear the shirt in August prior to the release of Some Secrets Hurt on September 16. The shirt could be given in drawings at presentations in schools and other settings. The shirt could also be sold in a variety of sizes, so that we all can send a message about ending abuse. One responder suggested that the t-shirt be a fitted one so that people who don’t find t-shirts flattering would enjoy wearing it.
Shadow Mountain isn’t sure about the t-shirt idea. Wait till they find out I have jewelry ideas too. I would love to see Maggie on necklaces, bracelets, and pins. We could all wear Maggie jewelry to remind us to stand up for kids and to have the courage to do what is right.
Maggie is my hero. She is an example to me of courage as she takes charge of her own body. She teaches adults to stand up for kids. She teaches kids to get help. She shows them that they can get better. Some Secrets Hurt is a story of healing. I know that Maggie will make a difference for kids of all ages.
The question is will we?
Linda Garner
Thanks to everyone who responded to my t-shirt blog last week. I have pitched this idea to Shadow Mountain, but they have not responded. They are interested in seeing the feedback that is generated from my blog.
Sixty people viewed my blog last Tuesday. Fifteen responded. Four responded directly on the blogsite. Eleven responded to my personal email. Six people indicated that they would wear the t-shirt. Six people said they would buy the book, and didn’t say whether they would wear the t-shirt. Three people said they would not wear the t-shirt. One of those three intends to buy the book. The other two didn't say. Fourteen responders were female. One responder was male.
One person suggested a different idea for the t-shirt and said that Stand Up For Kids was too general. This person suggested a different caption and a different picture. Maggie is the main character in Some Secrets Hurt. In the book Maggie is being abused and she finds the courage to tell. The suggestion is to feature Maggie on the t-shirt and have the caption read Maggie Has a Secret and There is Only One Thing to Do. The back would read Maggie Must Tell. These are quotes from the book. As you might guess, this responder has seen the book.
No one sent their name to be included on the t-shirt. I must admit I am surprised. Since we would only use first names, I felt this would be totally non-threatening. I feel that we are offering abuse victims a chance to fight back in a safe environment.
I love the t-shirt idea. I think it would be great to have bookstore employees wear the shirt in August prior to the release of Some Secrets Hurt on September 16. The shirt could be given in drawings at presentations in schools and other settings. The shirt could also be sold in a variety of sizes, so that we all can send a message about ending abuse. One responder suggested that the t-shirt be a fitted one so that people who don’t find t-shirts flattering would enjoy wearing it.
Shadow Mountain isn’t sure about the t-shirt idea. Wait till they find out I have jewelry ideas too. I would love to see Maggie on necklaces, bracelets, and pins. We could all wear Maggie jewelry to remind us to stand up for kids and to have the courage to do what is right.
Maggie is my hero. She is an example to me of courage as she takes charge of her own body. She teaches adults to stand up for kids. She teaches kids to get help. She shows them that they can get better. Some Secrets Hurt is a story of healing. I know that Maggie will make a difference for kids of all ages.
The question is will we?
Linda Garner
Tuesday, June 23, 2009
Stand Up For Kids
Linda, age 8. Jaime, age 5. Michael, age 7. Holli, age 10. Brandon, age 4. Crystal, age 12. Kim, age 15. Tom, age 6. McKensey, age 5. Anne, age 17. Ruth, age 9. Marla, age 6. Drew, age 13. Hilary, age 11. Brent, age 7. Hannah, age 16. Sandra, age 8. Cheri, age 12. Christopher, age 9. Paul, age 10. Gabby, age 9. Brad, age 14. Cari, age 6. James, age 3. Pearl, age 5. Kristi, age 8.
This isn’t a list of real people. I made it up, but, what if the names and ages were real? What if each name represented a real person who had been sexually abused, along with their age at the time the abuse began?
What if we filled the back of a t-shirt with first names and ages like these? What if the front of the shirt said Stand Up For Kids and directed you to a helpful website with information on preventing sexual abuse?
Maybe the website could give you ideas for teaching kids about abuse and maybe it could tell you what to do if the unthinkable happens to someone you love. Maybe the website could be called http://www.somesecretshurt.com/, and maybe it could tell you about an important book that will be released September 16. What if the book was a great tool for families, for parents, for teachers, and for kids of all ages.?What if the book was called Some Secrets Hurt?
What if the front of the t-shirt had a picture from Some Secrets Hurt? What if the picture represented a whole community with people of all ages and all ethnic group? What if the picture reminded us that keeping kids safe is everyone’s job? What if the t-shirt reminded us to stand up for kids?
Some Secrets Hurt is a real book, and http://www.somesecretshurt.com/ is under construction, but the t-shirt is still a dream. If the t-shirt were real, would you wear it? Would you buy it? Would you give it as a gift? I’d love to hear from you.
If you were ever abused, would you want your name included on the shirt? You can send your name to lindagarner@somesecretshurt.com. First name only. Include your age when you were abused.
Isn’t it time that we all stand up for kids?
Linda Garner
This isn’t a list of real people. I made it up, but, what if the names and ages were real? What if each name represented a real person who had been sexually abused, along with their age at the time the abuse began?
What if we filled the back of a t-shirt with first names and ages like these? What if the front of the shirt said Stand Up For Kids and directed you to a helpful website with information on preventing sexual abuse?
Maybe the website could give you ideas for teaching kids about abuse and maybe it could tell you what to do if the unthinkable happens to someone you love. Maybe the website could be called http://www.somesecretshurt.com/, and maybe it could tell you about an important book that will be released September 16. What if the book was a great tool for families, for parents, for teachers, and for kids of all ages.?What if the book was called Some Secrets Hurt?
What if the front of the t-shirt had a picture from Some Secrets Hurt? What if the picture represented a whole community with people of all ages and all ethnic group? What if the picture reminded us that keeping kids safe is everyone’s job? What if the t-shirt reminded us to stand up for kids?
Some Secrets Hurt is a real book, and http://www.somesecretshurt.com/ is under construction, but the t-shirt is still a dream. If the t-shirt were real, would you wear it? Would you buy it? Would you give it as a gift? I’d love to hear from you.
If you were ever abused, would you want your name included on the shirt? You can send your name to lindagarner@somesecretshurt.com. First name only. Include your age when you were abused.
Isn’t it time that we all stand up for kids?
Linda Garner
Tuesday, April 14, 2009
Just Like Christmas
It was just like Christ-mas. That darling fed ex man left a package on my door. I couldn’t wait to open it, because I knew what was inside. It was the galleys for my book, Some Secrets Hurt. Was it a stubborn package, or was I all thumbs? Friend Husband had to help me.My heart was dancing as we pulled out the beautiful pages and gazed at them in wonder. My dream is coming true. The artwork is lovely, the layouts are perfect, and the words are meaningful. The message is real and helpful. It is a message of hope and a message of healing. This project was inspired and I really cannot take the credit for it, but I am so grateful to have been included.
In my experience far too many lives have been damaged by sexual abuse. It is a rare family that has not experienced this heartbreaking betrayal of trust. It is time that a caring community steps up to the challenge and begins to put kids first.
According to the Parent Handbook distributed by the Salt Lake County Children’s Justice Center “Current statistics show that one out of every four girls and one out of every six boys will be sexually abused by the time they reach adulthood. People who sexually abuse children are rarely strangers to the child victim. In fact, the abuser is most often well known to the child (i.e. a relative, family friend, or neighbor). Abusers can be male or female; adult or juvenile; of any race, religion, or socio-economic status.”
If that doesn’t frighten you, you need to read it again.
Some Secrets Hurt is for everyone. It can be a child’s first instruction in avoiding the nightmare of sexual abuse. It can be a tool for a parent who wants to prevent sexual abuse. It provides information for a parent who has discovered sexual abuse and is unsure of the next step. It can strengthen a child who is experiencing sexual abuse, and help them find the courage to tell. It can promote comfort and healing for those who have unresolved issues relating to sexual abuse.
Who is Some Secrets Hurt for? Who is it not for? If you are a child, if you have a child, if you know a child, if you have been a child, Some Secrets Hurt is for you.
Some Secrets Hurt is being published by Shadow Mountain and will be released September 16. Every home should have one. My hope is that it will make a difference for children and families everywhere. Won’t you join me, and stand up now for our kids.
Linda Garner
P.S. My thanks to Brandilyn Speth, my talented friend and illustrator. Her illustrations are magic. You will love them. My thanks to all the wonderful people at Shadow Mountain who are making my dream come true. We would love to hear from you. Feel free to contact us: LindaGarner@somesecretshurt.com, Brandilyn@somesecretshurt.com Watch for our informative website: http://www.somesecretshurt.com/. Coming soon!
Tuesday, March 3, 2009
Stolen Childhood
Yesterday I felt so free.
Today I’m not the same.
Life used to be so sunny
and bright before you came
You took away a piece of me.
You trespassed on my heart.
I trusted you. You didn’t care.
My world just came apart.
Doubts and shadows cloud my thoughts.
Fear is my new friend.
A part of me is shattered.
How can it ever mend?
If only you could give it back,
what you took away for free.
Life is different now because
you stole childhood from me.
I’d like to run away somewhere,
a place where you can’t be,
where I can be myself again,
a happy child, carefree.
There’s only one way to be safe.
I know what I must do.
I’ll stand up for myself today.
I’ll tell them about you.
I hope that they’ll believe me.
I really think they will.
They’ve always been there for me.
I’m sure they’ll love me still.
I told them all about you.
They say I’m not to blame.
They’re sorry that it happened.
Alone, you wear the shame.
It’s my body and my life.
I always have a choice.
They listened to me and believed.
I have found my voice.
I know I will get better
though it may take some time.
There are kind people all around
to help me on this climb.
Healing isn’t easy
but I trust in God above.
I know that He is there for me
and I can feel His love.
Brandilyn and I have happy news about our book. Some Secrets Hurt will be officially released Sept 16th. We met recently with Shadow Mountain and were introduced to a wonderful group of people who are going to make our dream come true. We have a team of talented people working for us. We will soon have a website and business cards. The web address is http://www.somesecretshurt.com/. I will tell you when the website is launched. In addition we each have a personal email address for questions and comments about the book. Mine is already functional: lindagarner@somesecretshurt.com . Feel free to test it. I would love to hear from you. Brandilyn@somesecretshurt.com will soon be functional.
We are busily filling out our Author questionnaires and wondering who we can ask for endorsements. It sounds so official. I am doing my homework about stats. Brandilyn is putting the final touches on her artwork. May I tell you how beautiful the artwork is? It is just stunning and full of emotion. I feel so blessed that Brandilyn and I connected. Though Brandilyn and I are two people with different thoughts and ideas, in the book we come together as one voice. We hope that our voice will help children everywhere to find their voice.
We could use help with stats and endorsements. I find that statistics vary widely and are difficult to source. If anyone has ideas about where to find reliable stats, please email me with your thoughts, or you can post them here. Shadow Mountain would like ideas about professionals who might be willing to preview our book and comment for publication. If you have someone to suggest, again please email me or post those ideas here in the comments.
The professionals at Shadow Mountain are so kind and positive that we are thrilled to be working with them. Chris Schoebinger asked us if we had presented our book publicly yet. Brandilyn and I were both surprised at his suggestion that we could do this. We would love to share our book and our ideas with you. If you would like us to do a presentation for your women’s group or other organization, let us know. You know how to contact us. lindagarner@somesecretshurt.com
Stolen childhood is everyone’s concern. We are a community of caring adults. Let’s put aside our differences and stand together. Isn't it time that we all stand up for kids?
Linda Garner
Today I’m not the same.
Life used to be so sunny
and bright before you came
You took away a piece of me.
You trespassed on my heart.
I trusted you. You didn’t care.
My world just came apart.
Doubts and shadows cloud my thoughts.
Fear is my new friend.
A part of me is shattered.
How can it ever mend?
If only you could give it back,
what you took away for free.
Life is different now because
you stole childhood from me.
I’d like to run away somewhere,
a place where you can’t be,
where I can be myself again,
a happy child, carefree.
There’s only one way to be safe.
I know what I must do.
I’ll stand up for myself today.
I’ll tell them about you.
I hope that they’ll believe me.
I really think they will.
They’ve always been there for me.
I’m sure they’ll love me still.
I told them all about you.
They say I’m not to blame.
They’re sorry that it happened.
Alone, you wear the shame.
It’s my body and my life.
I always have a choice.
They listened to me and believed.
I have found my voice.
I know I will get better
though it may take some time.
There are kind people all around
to help me on this climb.
Healing isn’t easy
but I trust in God above.
I know that He is there for me
and I can feel His love.
Brandilyn and I have happy news about our book. Some Secrets Hurt will be officially released Sept 16th. We met recently with Shadow Mountain and were introduced to a wonderful group of people who are going to make our dream come true. We have a team of talented people working for us. We will soon have a website and business cards. The web address is http://www.somesecretshurt.com/. I will tell you when the website is launched. In addition we each have a personal email address for questions and comments about the book. Mine is already functional: lindagarner@somesecretshurt.com . Feel free to test it. I would love to hear from you. Brandilyn@somesecretshurt.com will soon be functional.
We are busily filling out our Author questionnaires and wondering who we can ask for endorsements. It sounds so official. I am doing my homework about stats. Brandilyn is putting the final touches on her artwork. May I tell you how beautiful the artwork is? It is just stunning and full of emotion. I feel so blessed that Brandilyn and I connected. Though Brandilyn and I are two people with different thoughts and ideas, in the book we come together as one voice. We hope that our voice will help children everywhere to find their voice.
We could use help with stats and endorsements. I find that statistics vary widely and are difficult to source. If anyone has ideas about where to find reliable stats, please email me with your thoughts, or you can post them here. Shadow Mountain would like ideas about professionals who might be willing to preview our book and comment for publication. If you have someone to suggest, again please email me or post those ideas here in the comments.
The professionals at Shadow Mountain are so kind and positive that we are thrilled to be working with them. Chris Schoebinger asked us if we had presented our book publicly yet. Brandilyn and I were both surprised at his suggestion that we could do this. We would love to share our book and our ideas with you. If you would like us to do a presentation for your women’s group or other organization, let us know. You know how to contact us. lindagarner@somesecretshurt.com
Stolen childhood is everyone’s concern. We are a community of caring adults. Let’s put aside our differences and stand together. Isn't it time that we all stand up for kids?
Linda Garner
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