There have been times I've been guilty of blaming and
lecturing my kids. If we are truthful, we've probably all been down this road.
Is there a better way to handle the situation?
The answer is yes. For me, I have to take a little time out
and calm myself down before I take care of the problem. While I'm 'timing myself
out,' I remember to ask myself the following question:
What do I want my
child to learn from this?
*An angry lecture tells the child he is at fault and
worthless.
*A calm lecture tell the child he is at fault and the adult
is in charge.
*Doling out the consequences tells the child he is at fault
and the adult is in charge.
*A discussion tells the child he is of value and can get away
with whatever he wants.
*A solution-focused discussion tells the child he is of
value. He can solve problems and direct his own life.
Read more about this subject in Family Talk, by Christy
Monson
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