The last screw was placed into the back of the dryer. The dryer repairman smiled at me and said in his New York accent, “Do you want me to hook up the lint dryer hose thingy.”
I smiled back and said, “I’m a writer. I can hook it up.” I gave him a thumbs up and a wink.
He gave me a thumbs up too. “You go writer ma’am” He didn’t say that, but I could totally read this thoughts (even though his eyes were narrowed and he had a confused look on his face.)
I led him upstairs and to the door assuring him I was a writer and could take care of the lint hose thingy and clean it out too.
I scrambled downstairs, broom in hand and towel in the other, ready to scrub that hose clean.
I cleaned that thing in record time.
Now the easy part, putting the hose thingy on the back of the dryer and the other end to the tube that led to the outside vent. Piece o’ cake.
I reached down and shoved the first end of the lint hose to the back of the dryer. It was tight as a nickel. My job was almost done. I just….had…to…*reaching up to tube that lead to outside*
I slid metal against metal.
The bottom of the tube popped off the dryer, banging against my leg. Not a problem. Maybe the dryer wasn’t close enough to the wall. I’d just crawl over the dryer and push the dryer closer to the wall.
I jumped up, doing a super hard gymnastic move to get out of my cramped hole and push the dryer towards the wall.
Getting back down the space was entirely different experience, but I did it, despite the electrical wires in the way.
I clutched the tube, with more determination. The aluminum slipped back into the dryer. I wiggled up, barely reaching the top and shoved it onto the tube above me. The bottom popped off again.
Twenty times I tried with sweat ran down my back and spiders crawled up my pant legs. I threw up my hands in the air and yelled, “I am a writer not a dryer repairman/woman! And I’m stuck!”
When I looked down and noticed the lint hose snug against the dryer. As fast as I could, I climbed out from behind the dryer (in 20 minutes flat) and placed the other side of the hose on the outside vent. It stayed.
That’s when I realized, I would have made a terrible dryer repairman/woman. It’s a good thing I like to write. *whew*