Tuesday, July 13, 2010

Dumber than Dirt Conclusion

I had a great time at my 40th class reunion. It was great to reminisce with old friends. I was the shortest one there (as usual) and when I stood to take the mic, someone shouted "Stand Up." So I stood on the chair. It was a good laugh.

I hope you enjoy the conclusion of Dumber than Dirt. If you haven't read part one and two, it won't make much sense. Scroll down a bit to read part one and two.

Dumber than Dirt part 3

As you can imagine, the warthogs had a pity party over this. You might say that they wallowed in pity. They were getting perturbed about their rights being pignored and the persecutions that had been piled upon them. They often heard gossip about things like Pork Bellies and Makin’ Bacon. Finally, I guess you could say they had a snoutful and they decided to make a pig point.

That was when the warthogs invented a game called phootball. They challenged the pretty pigs to a tournament which they called the Pigskin Classic. The pretty pigs bought phancy uniphorm shirts and since they thought they were pretty sharp, they called themselves the Razorback Hawgs. The warthogs were too poor to buy uniphorms, besides which they couldn’t stand to have any sort of phabric rubbing against their warts, so their uniphorms were plain pigskin. I think that’s where the term shirts and skins phirst started

Well, the handsome razorbacks were pretty proud of their uniphorms and they were pretty proud of their looks and it was clear they planned to win. However, the warthogs were phed up and they also planned to win. The Razorbacks were pretty but the warthogs passed, punted, persevered, perspired, and prevailed. Phinally – respect for the underhogs.

This was the beginning of better days for the warthogs. Eventually the Razorbacks and the warthogs came to accept their differences. Over time there was peace in the place. They learned to work together and managed to keep the wolf away from the door, and they even looked aphter the little piggee who had none. Though they never quite understood the little piggee who had roast beef, they lived pleasantly ever aphter.

I’m not sure what the moral of this phable is, but it is probably one of the phollowing. You pick.

*Warthogs are people, too.
*Don’t judge a pig by its cover.
*Iph you follow your dream, you might have the last lauph.
*Pvegetables are good for you.
*Warts are only skin deep.
*Don’t do stupid things.
*Try the simple things first and don’t get involved in any hogwash.

Now I think I know what you would do if perchance you were a pig in a spider inphested phorest, but these particular pigs, (warthogs) were not exactly the sharpest blades in the razor.

What do you think of the silly pigs who thought it was easier to put up with warts than to munch on the pigweed? Some would say they were perphectly silly. Others might think them lazy.

What do I say of these preposterous pigs? I simply say….they were dumber than dirt. Do you agree?

That’s all folks!

Pvegetable: pronunciation – pa/ veg/et/ a/ bl. (Root word: vegetable) Meaning: Edible plant that begins with p.


Carolyn V. said...

Awesome story! I'm glad you had a good time at your reunion! =)

L.T. Elliot said...

So cute! Love the pic of you standing on the chair. ;) You're so clever.