Point of View is a difficult subject for grown ups, so why would I teach it to kids. Let's just say I love teaching kids, and I believe in them.
Kids are smart. The thing they lack is experience. I believe they can grasp any topic if you teach it right and give them a chance.
Today I taught second graders about point of view. They were really talkative on Monday, so I first had to talk about behavior. They're never to young to learn respect. It's hard to teach anything without a healthy dose of respect. Maybe some kids are born with it, and maybe some kids learn it at home, but a teacher has to insist on it. Without respect, chaos reigns, and learning suffers.
After the behavior lesson we were able to have fun learning about POV or as I prefer to call it, Voice. As kids analyze a story to find the voice, they can also tell you something about the character. What are his good qualities? What are his weaknesses? What does he want? What is he thinking? Feeling?
Kids are especially good at identifying what the character might be feeling. Kids have empathy. Nice.
I love to share my book, Grudge Rock with them, because they can identify with the feelings of the two main characters, Walker and Jake. They are really drawn in to the story as I pull rocks out of my pockets, to illustrate the story. Often they aren't sure what a grudge is at the beginning of the story, but in the end, they get it. Oh, they get it.
Kids who learn to write will have an edge on those who don't. They may never become writers, but the skill is important in education, in business, in life. I do author visits for the kids, because I want to make a difference. I do author visits for me, because it's fun.
Linda Garner
Showing posts with label make a difference. Show all posts
Showing posts with label make a difference. Show all posts
Wednesday, March 21, 2012
Tuesday, September 13, 2011
Choosing Light
Where were you on the morning of Sept 11, 2001? Do you remember?
I remember. For most of us, that moment will be permanently imprinted in memory: the moment we discovered that America had been betrayed. What did the betrayal feel like to you? Was it personal? Did you feel connected or detached? Were you angry, confused, frightened, sad, depressed, or all of the above?
A friend of mine who works in the mental health field reports that anxiety became rampant in wake of 9/11. She says that anxiety was relatively rare in the days before the terrorist attack and became widespread in the days and years that followed.
Not everyone gave in to terror. Some shelved their worries in a hidden place and buried them for another day. Some chose indifference. Some hardened their hearts. Others turned to faith.
Many chose prayer. A nation that had largely abandoned prayer suddenly became very prayerful…for a time. In a gesture of hope, my neighborhood displayed luminaries. We lit candles, laid them on a bed of sand in a one room paper house, and placed them near the street. A silent glow of unity lit our street against the ugliness of the day, and the shadowy curtain of night.
Things have changed since the day terror knocked on our front door. Security is the new game in town. War is our new neighbor. And for some, a new fear moved in to stay.
Is it a coincidence that ten years later our economy is close to ruin, taxes gnaw hungrily at our paychecks, beefy government fingers poke at every pie, and joblessness lives in the spare bedroom.
We voted for change, but not this change. We hoped for improvement. Government behaves badly, much like a chubby, spoiled, manipulative child. It stamps its feet and cries for its way. It bullies us and kicks us when we’re down.
When I was young, I thought the end of the world was around the next corner. This both thrilled and worried me, for I knew that it would be a great and simultaneously terrible day. Would I grow old enough to finish school? To marry? To be a mother? What kind of world would I introduce my children to?
As a young mother, I stewed about wars and rumors of wars. I wrinkled my forehead over earthquakes in diverse places. I watched for the moon to turn to blood. When I could afford to, I stored food and water and wheat. Lots of wheat. I stored fabric and flashlights. I stored batteries, and candles, and clothes.
I once had a depression coat, a walking to Missouri coat, just in case. It was ugly as sin, but it was sturdy and warm. I knew I would never wear it, unless there was a crisis, yet I clung to it like hope. I knew that it would keep me warm against a dark and sinister nameless storm.
The coat is gone, but I still store food, and also hope, for I have learned that storms are a part of life. The thunder and lightning may frighten me, but I have control. I can choose peace. I can choose gratitude. I can choose faith. The most dangerous storm is the one that rages in my mind. Shall I choose fear or faith? Shall I choose chaos or stillness?
I have learned that most storms pass and that if we are prepared we shall not fear. I have learned that the only true safety lies inside my heart, the hand of my neighbor, the touch of a friend. I have learned that peace lies not in absolute safety but in trust and in my bucket of faith. I have learned to cling to my family, to strengthen my friends, and to share that bucket of faith with those in need.
There are more earthquakes now, and they have moved closer. The voices of war grow louder. Peace is not for sale, but it is abundant even in the growing chaos. Would you like a drink from my bucket of faith? Here, take my hand.
Abundance is mine. Peace, joy, and trust are abundant for those who know where to look.
America has a wonderful way of reinventing itself. We still have a lot going for us. We have a lot to be thankful for. We can make a difference. Be part of the solution. Believe it or not, whining is not a solution. Become the change you long for.
Gather your family. Gather your stores. Gather your courage. Believe. Hope. Trust. Trust in the Lord with all you heart and lean not unto thine own understanding. In all thy ways acknowledge Him and He shall direct thy paths.
9/11/2011. It’s a perfect day for finding peace. Light a candle of faith in your heart and feel the glow of peace. Hold it out against the darkness surrounding you. Refuse to give in to darkness. Choose light. Choose gratitude. Choose abundance.
Count your blessings. Rejoice in abundance. Share your gifts. Strengthen your faith.
Linda Garner
I remember. For most of us, that moment will be permanently imprinted in memory: the moment we discovered that America had been betrayed. What did the betrayal feel like to you? Was it personal? Did you feel connected or detached? Were you angry, confused, frightened, sad, depressed, or all of the above?
A friend of mine who works in the mental health field reports that anxiety became rampant in wake of 9/11. She says that anxiety was relatively rare in the days before the terrorist attack and became widespread in the days and years that followed.
Not everyone gave in to terror. Some shelved their worries in a hidden place and buried them for another day. Some chose indifference. Some hardened their hearts. Others turned to faith.
Many chose prayer. A nation that had largely abandoned prayer suddenly became very prayerful…for a time. In a gesture of hope, my neighborhood displayed luminaries. We lit candles, laid them on a bed of sand in a one room paper house, and placed them near the street. A silent glow of unity lit our street against the ugliness of the day, and the shadowy curtain of night.
Things have changed since the day terror knocked on our front door. Security is the new game in town. War is our new neighbor. And for some, a new fear moved in to stay.
Is it a coincidence that ten years later our economy is close to ruin, taxes gnaw hungrily at our paychecks, beefy government fingers poke at every pie, and joblessness lives in the spare bedroom.
We voted for change, but not this change. We hoped for improvement. Government behaves badly, much like a chubby, spoiled, manipulative child. It stamps its feet and cries for its way. It bullies us and kicks us when we’re down.
When I was young, I thought the end of the world was around the next corner. This both thrilled and worried me, for I knew that it would be a great and simultaneously terrible day. Would I grow old enough to finish school? To marry? To be a mother? What kind of world would I introduce my children to?
As a young mother, I stewed about wars and rumors of wars. I wrinkled my forehead over earthquakes in diverse places. I watched for the moon to turn to blood. When I could afford to, I stored food and water and wheat. Lots of wheat. I stored fabric and flashlights. I stored batteries, and candles, and clothes.
I once had a depression coat, a walking to Missouri coat, just in case. It was ugly as sin, but it was sturdy and warm. I knew I would never wear it, unless there was a crisis, yet I clung to it like hope. I knew that it would keep me warm against a dark and sinister nameless storm.
The coat is gone, but I still store food, and also hope, for I have learned that storms are a part of life. The thunder and lightning may frighten me, but I have control. I can choose peace. I can choose gratitude. I can choose faith. The most dangerous storm is the one that rages in my mind. Shall I choose fear or faith? Shall I choose chaos or stillness?
I have learned that most storms pass and that if we are prepared we shall not fear. I have learned that the only true safety lies inside my heart, the hand of my neighbor, the touch of a friend. I have learned that peace lies not in absolute safety but in trust and in my bucket of faith. I have learned to cling to my family, to strengthen my friends, and to share that bucket of faith with those in need.
There are more earthquakes now, and they have moved closer. The voices of war grow louder. Peace is not for sale, but it is abundant even in the growing chaos. Would you like a drink from my bucket of faith? Here, take my hand.
Abundance is mine. Peace, joy, and trust are abundant for those who know where to look.
America has a wonderful way of reinventing itself. We still have a lot going for us. We have a lot to be thankful for. We can make a difference. Be part of the solution. Believe it or not, whining is not a solution. Become the change you long for.
Gather your family. Gather your stores. Gather your courage. Believe. Hope. Trust. Trust in the Lord with all you heart and lean not unto thine own understanding. In all thy ways acknowledge Him and He shall direct thy paths.
9/11/2011. It’s a perfect day for finding peace. Light a candle of faith in your heart and feel the glow of peace. Hold it out against the darkness surrounding you. Refuse to give in to darkness. Choose light. Choose gratitude. Choose abundance.
Count your blessings. Rejoice in abundance. Share your gifts. Strengthen your faith.
Linda Garner
Tuesday, August 24, 2010
Why Giving Matters by Arthur C. Brooks Part 4
Here is the conclusion to Why Giving Matters by Arthur C. Brooks. I know I will be thinking about these things for a very long time. I am so thankful that I have been given the opportunity to give. I invite you to join me and make a difference. Linda Garner
Dispel the Myths of Giving
So how else (besides buying somebody a briefcase) can you help other people give more today? First, you can help to dispel some myths about charitable giving.
Myth number one: Giving makes us poorer. You hear this all the time. This is what the economist like me thinks. It’s wrong, and you have to fight it. And there are arguments that say it’s not just the hand of God—at least not directly the hand of God. Instead, maybe it’s the hand of God through our neurochemistry, the way giving changes the structure of our brains. But there are good explanations for why this myth is not true.
Myth number two: People are naturally selfish. I hear this constantly. People are selfish, it’s true, but they’re not naturally selfish; people are unnaturally selfish. When we are our best selves, when we are in equilibrium, when we are where we’re supposed to be cognitively, neurochemically, and spiritually, then we are giving people.
Myth number three: Giving is a luxury. It’s not. It’s a necessity—the first 10 percent, not the last 10 percent. And the reason is that if we want to be better, we have to give.
Myth number four: You will hear in the coming days and weeks and months that if our country were doing what it should be doing for people in need, then we wouldn’t need private giving, that the government would be taking care of people who need it, and that we would not need you to step in to provide for others. I am here to tell you, having looked at the data, that the day the government takes over for you in your private charity is the day we get poorer, unhappier, and unhealthier. We must demand to take our place as givers and support the communities and people who need the services we can provide.
The second way you can help other people give more is to remember that somebody is always watching you. You’re always creating an example, and, as such, you’re a teacher. Make sure that it’s clear that you’re a charitable giver—and others will emulate you.
And a third way is to use your creativity to teach giving. How can we bring our creativity to bear more in our families, in our churches? How can we create a curriculum where giving is a core competency? We’re not very good at teaching giving; yet this is a core competency for successful citizenship and a happy life. We need to be better about teaching it.
We need to discover more creative solutions to working these concepts into our everyday life. This has changed my life a lot. When I was working on this research four years ago, I came home with a chapter from a book that showed these data analyses. My wife read it and said, “I think this is really something. I think we can use this.”
“Yeah, we should give more,” I answered. “We should write bigger checks. We should take this seriously.”
She said, “No. I think we should do something bigger. I think we should adopt a baby.”
And I said, “Sweetheart, it’s only a book.”
But I had no argument. We had to do it. And we did it. It was the best thing we ever did. And that changed our life even more.
I promise you that this really works. Either because of God in heaven—or because of our neurochemistry. But it really works.
I’m a happy prosperous person because I live in a country with people who serve. Because you give to your churches and the causes that you care about in Utah, I have a richer, happier, and healthier life (even though I live in Washington, D.C.). For that, I thank you.
Arthur C. Brooks
Dispel the Myths of Giving
So how else (besides buying somebody a briefcase) can you help other people give more today? First, you can help to dispel some myths about charitable giving.
Myth number one: Giving makes us poorer. You hear this all the time. This is what the economist like me thinks. It’s wrong, and you have to fight it. And there are arguments that say it’s not just the hand of God—at least not directly the hand of God. Instead, maybe it’s the hand of God through our neurochemistry, the way giving changes the structure of our brains. But there are good explanations for why this myth is not true.
Myth number two: People are naturally selfish. I hear this constantly. People are selfish, it’s true, but they’re not naturally selfish; people are unnaturally selfish. When we are our best selves, when we are in equilibrium, when we are where we’re supposed to be cognitively, neurochemically, and spiritually, then we are giving people.
Myth number three: Giving is a luxury. It’s not. It’s a necessity—the first 10 percent, not the last 10 percent. And the reason is that if we want to be better, we have to give.
Myth number four: You will hear in the coming days and weeks and months that if our country were doing what it should be doing for people in need, then we wouldn’t need private giving, that the government would be taking care of people who need it, and that we would not need you to step in to provide for others. I am here to tell you, having looked at the data, that the day the government takes over for you in your private charity is the day we get poorer, unhappier, and unhealthier. We must demand to take our place as givers and support the communities and people who need the services we can provide.
The second way you can help other people give more is to remember that somebody is always watching you. You’re always creating an example, and, as such, you’re a teacher. Make sure that it’s clear that you’re a charitable giver—and others will emulate you.
And a third way is to use your creativity to teach giving. How can we bring our creativity to bear more in our families, in our churches? How can we create a curriculum where giving is a core competency? We’re not very good at teaching giving; yet this is a core competency for successful citizenship and a happy life. We need to be better about teaching it.
We need to discover more creative solutions to working these concepts into our everyday life. This has changed my life a lot. When I was working on this research four years ago, I came home with a chapter from a book that showed these data analyses. My wife read it and said, “I think this is really something. I think we can use this.”
“Yeah, we should give more,” I answered. “We should write bigger checks. We should take this seriously.”
She said, “No. I think we should do something bigger. I think we should adopt a baby.”
And I said, “Sweetheart, it’s only a book.”
But I had no argument. We had to do it. And we did it. It was the best thing we ever did. And that changed our life even more.
I promise you that this really works. Either because of God in heaven—or because of our neurochemistry. But it really works.
I’m a happy prosperous person because I live in a country with people who serve. Because you give to your churches and the causes that you care about in Utah, I have a richer, happier, and healthier life (even though I live in Washington, D.C.). For that, I thank you.
Arthur C. Brooks
Tuesday, March 30, 2010
You CAN make a difference
Everyone wants to make a difference. When we hear about children who have been abused our hearts ache. “How did it happen?” we wonder. When it ends in tragedy we feel deep sorrow, and regret. Could something have been done? Can we do something to prevent child abuse? Can we make a difference?
Because I believe that we can stop this madness, I am involved in child abuse prevention. I invite you to join us in that effort. You can start by participating in the No More Secrets walk/run. You can sign up today. You can help us spread the word. You can encourage your friends and family to sign up.
Our contest for a $25.00 Barnes and Noble Gift Card is still open. You have until Friday at midnight to block, twitter, or facebook about the walk. Each of those earns you one chance to win. Respond to this post to tell me how many chances you have earned. I’ll throw in an extra chance to anyone who does a mass email about the walk. Send it out to everyone in your address book. If you get us a spot on the radio or in a newspaper, I’ll give you three chances to win.
I could use your help lining up entertainment. Some of the folks we expected to come through for entertainment haven't, and so I am scrambling to fill some time slots. After the walk we will have free food and entertainment, along with drawings for cool stuff. This is a family friendly walk, so we want family friendly stuff. Do you know any performers who would enjoy the chance to make a difference?
We also need sponsors of every kind. If you know of a business or an individual who would like to donate food, prizes for drawings, or money, let me know. Everyone who donates will get their name on our website and be recognized on the day of the walk. Anyone who donates $100 will also have their name on the back of the t-shirt. Good advertising. Sponsors for the t-shirts need to be in this week, so that we have time to print the shirts.
Do you have a service or a product that you could donate for our drawings? Do you have a business who could use this kind of advertising?
I would love for you to come participate in the walk on April 17. It's just $5.00 if you pre-register. At the walk it will be $10.00. You can pre-register any time before April 17. If you register by Friday, you get a free t-shirt. April is Child Abuse Prevention Month. Why not walk with us to prevent child abuse? Register at ahealingplacemonument.org.
Oh and by the way, did I mention…We’re gonna have a good time! Come join us. We’re gonna make a difference, and we're gonna have fun!
Our goal is No More Secrets, because Some Secrets Hurt.
Linda Garner
Because I believe that we can stop this madness, I am involved in child abuse prevention. I invite you to join us in that effort. You can start by participating in the No More Secrets walk/run. You can sign up today. You can help us spread the word. You can encourage your friends and family to sign up.
Our contest for a $25.00 Barnes and Noble Gift Card is still open. You have until Friday at midnight to block, twitter, or facebook about the walk. Each of those earns you one chance to win. Respond to this post to tell me how many chances you have earned. I’ll throw in an extra chance to anyone who does a mass email about the walk. Send it out to everyone in your address book. If you get us a spot on the radio or in a newspaper, I’ll give you three chances to win.
I could use your help lining up entertainment. Some of the folks we expected to come through for entertainment haven't, and so I am scrambling to fill some time slots. After the walk we will have free food and entertainment, along with drawings for cool stuff. This is a family friendly walk, so we want family friendly stuff. Do you know any performers who would enjoy the chance to make a difference?
We also need sponsors of every kind. If you know of a business or an individual who would like to donate food, prizes for drawings, or money, let me know. Everyone who donates will get their name on our website and be recognized on the day of the walk. Anyone who donates $100 will also have their name on the back of the t-shirt. Good advertising. Sponsors for the t-shirts need to be in this week, so that we have time to print the shirts.
Do you have a service or a product that you could donate for our drawings? Do you have a business who could use this kind of advertising?
I would love for you to come participate in the walk on April 17. It's just $5.00 if you pre-register. At the walk it will be $10.00. You can pre-register any time before April 17. If you register by Friday, you get a free t-shirt. April is Child Abuse Prevention Month. Why not walk with us to prevent child abuse? Register at ahealingplacemonument.org.
Oh and by the way, did I mention…We’re gonna have a good time! Come join us. We’re gonna make a difference, and we're gonna have fun!
Our goal is No More Secrets, because Some Secrets Hurt.
Linda Garner
Tuesday, February 23, 2010
The Queen of Chaos
What’s your vision for today? For tomorrow? Where do you want to be a year from now? Ten years down the road?
If you’re like me, it’s hard to plan ahead. Some days I can barely think five minutes ahead, yet I know people who live orderly lives. Their future is mapped out and they surround themselves with organization.
I do not do order. I do chaos. On good days, I do controlled chaos. I admire order, but that’s as far as it goes. Perhaps I was the queen of chaos in a former life.
Ever read The Spyglass by Richard Paul Evans? It’s one of my favorites, but not because of the dialogue or the illustrations. I love the magical story. I love it because it inspires me and moves me away from the ordinary. I love it because it helps me see things not as they are, but as they could be.
In The Spyglass, the king of a struggling kingdom is visited by a mysterious stranger who offers an unusual gift in exchange for supper and a bed for the night. The curious king agrees to his bargain.
The gift turns out to be a spyglass which lets you see things not as they are, but as they could be. The stranger leaves his spyglass with the king for two harvests.
For two years the king visits his people and shows them what could be, through the lens of possibility. He invites them to create change.
When the stranger returns to retrieve his spyglass he finds a prosperous and happy kingdom instead of the miserable kingdom he once visited. Not wanting to lose such a treasure, the king offers the stranger much gold in exchange for the spyglass.
The stranger has one more lesson to teach. He explains that the king no longer needs the spyglass to show him possibilities, for now the king has vision. He and his people understand possibilities.
Like the mysterious stranger, I believe in possibilities. I believe in change. I believe in people and their ability to create change.
In my writing, in my life, in my world, show me possibilities, and then I can do anything. I may be the queen of chaos, but I can make a difference. I can create change.
Join me. Let’s share our vision. Together, we can make a difference. Believe. Create.
Linda Garner
If you’re like me, it’s hard to plan ahead. Some days I can barely think five minutes ahead, yet I know people who live orderly lives. Their future is mapped out and they surround themselves with organization.
I do not do order. I do chaos. On good days, I do controlled chaos. I admire order, but that’s as far as it goes. Perhaps I was the queen of chaos in a former life.
Ever read The Spyglass by Richard Paul Evans? It’s one of my favorites, but not because of the dialogue or the illustrations. I love the magical story. I love it because it inspires me and moves me away from the ordinary. I love it because it helps me see things not as they are, but as they could be.
In The Spyglass, the king of a struggling kingdom is visited by a mysterious stranger who offers an unusual gift in exchange for supper and a bed for the night. The curious king agrees to his bargain.
The gift turns out to be a spyglass which lets you see things not as they are, but as they could be. The stranger leaves his spyglass with the king for two harvests.
For two years the king visits his people and shows them what could be, through the lens of possibility. He invites them to create change.
When the stranger returns to retrieve his spyglass he finds a prosperous and happy kingdom instead of the miserable kingdom he once visited. Not wanting to lose such a treasure, the king offers the stranger much gold in exchange for the spyglass.
The stranger has one more lesson to teach. He explains that the king no longer needs the spyglass to show him possibilities, for now the king has vision. He and his people understand possibilities.
Like the mysterious stranger, I believe in possibilities. I believe in change. I believe in people and their ability to create change.
In my writing, in my life, in my world, show me possibilities, and then I can do anything. I may be the queen of chaos, but I can make a difference. I can create change.
Join me. Let’s share our vision. Together, we can make a difference. Believe. Create.
Linda Garner
Tuesday, November 24, 2009
Two Hands
I have loved all the great posts and thoughts on gratitude during the past few weeks. This is a great time to reflect on our blessings and choose to be grateful. It’s also a wonderful time to reach out. I hope that you will join me tonight with the Teddy Bear Ladies to reach out to abused children. You can make a difference. You can do it today. All you need is two hands and an hour or two.
The Teddy Bear Ladies meet the 4th Tuesday of every month to make bears for abused children. If you follow my blog on www.somesecretshurt.com you have read about them. They make 50 bears each month for the Children’s Justice Center in Provo. The Children’s Justice Center helps abused children. Most of the children they see have been sexually abused. They offer counseling and medical services for abused children, and everyone gets a bear. The Teddy Bear Ladies have been making bears for 18 years.
The T.B. Ladies meet tonight and they need to make 100 bears, so that they can take December off. Let’s give them a hand. They need our help, and we need a chance to make a difference.
You can show up tonight anytime from 3:00-9:00 and stay as long as you like. The Ladies meet at the Rock Creek Church at 2445 N. 650 E. in Provo. It’s right next to the Rock Creek Elementary School. Park in the back and join the bearmakers in the Relief Society Room.
You know the saying, Many hands make light work. The Teddy Bear Ladies could use your hands. Want to make a difference? How about today. I'll bring my hands. I'd love to see you there.
Linda Garner
P.S.
If you can't come, but would like to donate fabric or cash, call Ruth Brasier at 801-374-9482. If you can't come but would like to sew some bears, give Ruth a call. See you there.
The Teddy Bear Ladies meet the 4th Tuesday of every month to make bears for abused children. If you follow my blog on www.somesecretshurt.com you have read about them. They make 50 bears each month for the Children’s Justice Center in Provo. The Children’s Justice Center helps abused children. Most of the children they see have been sexually abused. They offer counseling and medical services for abused children, and everyone gets a bear. The Teddy Bear Ladies have been making bears for 18 years.
The T.B. Ladies meet tonight and they need to make 100 bears, so that they can take December off. Let’s give them a hand. They need our help, and we need a chance to make a difference.
You can show up tonight anytime from 3:00-9:00 and stay as long as you like. The Ladies meet at the Rock Creek Church at 2445 N. 650 E. in Provo. It’s right next to the Rock Creek Elementary School. Park in the back and join the bearmakers in the Relief Society Room.
You know the saying, Many hands make light work. The Teddy Bear Ladies could use your hands. Want to make a difference? How about today. I'll bring my hands. I'd love to see you there.
Linda Garner
P.S.
If you can't come, but would like to donate fabric or cash, call Ruth Brasier at 801-374-9482. If you can't come but would like to sew some bears, give Ruth a call. See you there.
Tuesday, November 10, 2009
Not About Elephants
Bobby: "Psssst. Don't tell anyone. It's our secret! There's an elephant in the living room, but we're pretending it's not really there and it's not really an elephant."
Billy: "But it smells and it's enormous!"
Bobby: "Just ignore it. Maybe it will go away."
Sounds pretty silly, doesn't it? Ignoring an elephant in the living room. How could anyone ignore an elephant in the living room?
Just think for a minute what it would be like. An elephant would take up most of the room. It would be difficult to watch TV, look out the windows, or see each other. Carrying on a conversation with an elephant in the living room would be tricky. And think what an elephant could do to the carpet.
How can you think of much else except how to clean up the mess the elephant makes? What do you do when company comes...put a doily on it? How can you even talk on the phone when there's an elephant trumpeting in the living room? And how do you convince the children, your friends, your family, and yourself there's not an elephant there?
Okay, so no sane person would keep an elephant in their living room.
The dialog about the elephant in the living room was written about alcoholism, but alcoholism isn't the only elephant, is it? An elephant in the living room is any problem that we don't want to talk about. It's the thing that we pretend isn't real, that we hide in corners and we sweep under the rug.
I chose to write a book about an elephant. My elephant is called sexual abuse.
This is the way I began my keynote address to the students who attended Wending Words, Journeying Toward Meaning. It was a great attention getter, and it set the stage for my topic, writing about a sensitive subject. I was able to share with the students my journey to publishing Some Secrets Hurt and why I write about sensitive subjects. I write to make a difference.
I shared with the kids my TV interview, we read my book together, and we talked about the statistics. As you may know, current stats indicate that one in four girls and one in six boys will be sexually abused before the age of eighteen. This is shocking for most people to hear, but the kids never batted an eye. What do they know that we don't know?
We talked about what those numbers might represent in their individual high schools. Given the stats, everyone knows someone who has been sexually abused. One third of those who have been abused will never tell anyone. I asked the students what they could do to help someone who has been abused, especially if they don't know for sure. I suggested that we all could be a little kinder to everyone we meet, especially the ones who don't seem to fit in. What if the reason they don't fit in is because they are carrying a secret; a secret shame, a secret hurt, a secret that has shattered their self-esteem? Some Secrets Hurt.
I talked about some of my favorite illustrations in the book, and showed them how Brandilyn brought Maggie to life. I told the students how Brandilyn and I met and shared our passion for making a difference. I highlighted some of the important ideas presented in the book: Sexual abuse is never the victim's fault. Teenagers as well as children are targets for sexual abuse. Abusers are rarely strangers. Whether you are a child or a teenager, you need help to stop the abuse. The only way to get help is to tell an adult that you trust. If the adult you tell does not believe you, or does not help you, talk to someone else. Keep telling until you find someone who helps you. You can heal if you get help. It's really hard on your own.
I told the young writers that point of view is a writer's secret weapon. Point of view is what allows us to get into a character's head and understand what he or she is feeling and thinking. Maggie is what makes Some Secrets Hurt real. She softens a difficult message. We identify with her. We cheer for her. We want her to tell. We want her to get help. We hope her parents will believe her. Maggie is my hero.
If you want to write about an elephant, it is important that you
1. Believe in your elephant. How big is your passion? Is your passion as big as your elephant?
2. Know your facts. This helps you to tell the truth and be convincing.
3. Create a believable character and allow them to tell your story. You can talk about anything, if you do it in a character's voice. Get inside your character's head.
When I wrote Some Secrets Hurt, I wanted to give children and teenagers a voice. I wanted to give parents a tool. I wanted a book that was simple enough for young children, yet meaningful enough for teenagers. I wanted to write a book that was informative enough for parents and teachers, yet powerful enough to promote healing for victims of all ages. How could I write a book that would cross age boundaries, gender boundaries, cultural and religious boundaries?
This would have been a difficult task if I had tried to do it alone, but I had help. I had help from a little girl named Maggie.
Linda Garner
P.S.
If you would like to read about my closing address, Making a Difference, visit http://www.somesecretshurt.com/ tomorrow.
Billy: "But it smells and it's enormous!"
Bobby: "Just ignore it. Maybe it will go away."
Sounds pretty silly, doesn't it? Ignoring an elephant in the living room. How could anyone ignore an elephant in the living room?
Just think for a minute what it would be like. An elephant would take up most of the room. It would be difficult to watch TV, look out the windows, or see each other. Carrying on a conversation with an elephant in the living room would be tricky. And think what an elephant could do to the carpet.
How can you think of much else except how to clean up the mess the elephant makes? What do you do when company comes...put a doily on it? How can you even talk on the phone when there's an elephant trumpeting in the living room? And how do you convince the children, your friends, your family, and yourself there's not an elephant there?
Okay, so no sane person would keep an elephant in their living room.
The dialog about the elephant in the living room was written about alcoholism, but alcoholism isn't the only elephant, is it? An elephant in the living room is any problem that we don't want to talk about. It's the thing that we pretend isn't real, that we hide in corners and we sweep under the rug.
I chose to write a book about an elephant. My elephant is called sexual abuse.
This is the way I began my keynote address to the students who attended Wending Words, Journeying Toward Meaning. It was a great attention getter, and it set the stage for my topic, writing about a sensitive subject. I was able to share with the students my journey to publishing Some Secrets Hurt and why I write about sensitive subjects. I write to make a difference.
I shared with the kids my TV interview, we read my book together, and we talked about the statistics. As you may know, current stats indicate that one in four girls and one in six boys will be sexually abused before the age of eighteen. This is shocking for most people to hear, but the kids never batted an eye. What do they know that we don't know?
We talked about what those numbers might represent in their individual high schools. Given the stats, everyone knows someone who has been sexually abused. One third of those who have been abused will never tell anyone. I asked the students what they could do to help someone who has been abused, especially if they don't know for sure. I suggested that we all could be a little kinder to everyone we meet, especially the ones who don't seem to fit in. What if the reason they don't fit in is because they are carrying a secret; a secret shame, a secret hurt, a secret that has shattered their self-esteem? Some Secrets Hurt.
I talked about some of my favorite illustrations in the book, and showed them how Brandilyn brought Maggie to life. I told the students how Brandilyn and I met and shared our passion for making a difference. I highlighted some of the important ideas presented in the book: Sexual abuse is never the victim's fault. Teenagers as well as children are targets for sexual abuse. Abusers are rarely strangers. Whether you are a child or a teenager, you need help to stop the abuse. The only way to get help is to tell an adult that you trust. If the adult you tell does not believe you, or does not help you, talk to someone else. Keep telling until you find someone who helps you. You can heal if you get help. It's really hard on your own.
I told the young writers that point of view is a writer's secret weapon. Point of view is what allows us to get into a character's head and understand what he or she is feeling and thinking. Maggie is what makes Some Secrets Hurt real. She softens a difficult message. We identify with her. We cheer for her. We want her to tell. We want her to get help. We hope her parents will believe her. Maggie is my hero.
If you want to write about an elephant, it is important that you
1. Believe in your elephant. How big is your passion? Is your passion as big as your elephant?
2. Know your facts. This helps you to tell the truth and be convincing.
3. Create a believable character and allow them to tell your story. You can talk about anything, if you do it in a character's voice. Get inside your character's head.
When I wrote Some Secrets Hurt, I wanted to give children and teenagers a voice. I wanted to give parents a tool. I wanted a book that was simple enough for young children, yet meaningful enough for teenagers. I wanted to write a book that was informative enough for parents and teachers, yet powerful enough to promote healing for victims of all ages. How could I write a book that would cross age boundaries, gender boundaries, cultural and religious boundaries?
This would have been a difficult task if I had tried to do it alone, but I had help. I had help from a little girl named Maggie.
Linda Garner
P.S.
If you would like to read about my closing address, Making a Difference, visit http://www.somesecretshurt.com/ tomorrow.
Tuesday, September 8, 2009
Studio 5: Can you believe it?
Can you believe it? I am going to be on Studio 5. One week from today on September 15 at 11:00, I will be on the air. Have you seen Studio 5? It’s a neat show with lots of features about current trends and new ideas. I am so excited to be able to share Some Secrets Hurt on such a great show. Spread the word.
Am I nervous? That’s what everyone wants to know. Should I be? I am not the least bit nervous about my message. I love talking to people about Some Secrets Hurt. I love talking about protecting kids and empowering them to take control of their own bodies. I love giving parents tools so that they can talk to their kids about sexual abuse. I love getting teachers and other adults on board. Keeping kids safe is everyone’s job. I envision a caring community that is committed to kids and works together to protect them.
So, I think I’m not nervous. On the other hand, though, I am a little bit OCD about what to wear. Does this make me look fat? Is this color good on me? Should I wear dressy or casual? I have been spending a lot of time (and money) at Christopher Banks, my favorite store, and I have been experimenting with my hair and makeup. I changed to brown mascara like that Dressing Your Truth lady said I should, and I tried some of her very expensive products, so that I could look good.
I know that this is not about me, or my clothes and hair; it’s about the message. I just want to be a good messenger.
This is not my message; this is Heavenly Father’s message. He wants Some Secrets Hurt in every home where it can make a difference. He wants adults everywhere to teach kids about the sacredness of their bodies. He wants them to be able to stand up for themselves. He wants us to teach them how to say no. He wants us to stop abuse from happening so that his kids can heal. He wants us to stop the epidemic and be part of the solution. He wants us to reach out to teenagers who are at risk, and to wounded adults who don’t know how to heal.
I am honored to be a voice for children. I am not afraid to talk about sexual abuse. I am not nervous about teaching truth. I am excited to represent kids on T.V. I just want to look good, so that I can represent them well.
Hey, what are you doing later today? How about coming over and helping me figure out what to wear? We could experiment with my hair, and you could tell me if my new makeup looks orange. We could even talk about making a difference for kids.
Be sure to watch Studio 5 next Tuesday at 11:00 on KSL. If you can’t watch it, maybe you can record it. There is strength in numbers. Though we won’t be in the same room, I’m sure I’ll feel your strength. Together, we can make a difference.
Linda Garner
Am I nervous? That’s what everyone wants to know. Should I be? I am not the least bit nervous about my message. I love talking to people about Some Secrets Hurt. I love talking about protecting kids and empowering them to take control of their own bodies. I love giving parents tools so that they can talk to their kids about sexual abuse. I love getting teachers and other adults on board. Keeping kids safe is everyone’s job. I envision a caring community that is committed to kids and works together to protect them.
So, I think I’m not nervous. On the other hand, though, I am a little bit OCD about what to wear. Does this make me look fat? Is this color good on me? Should I wear dressy or casual? I have been spending a lot of time (and money) at Christopher Banks, my favorite store, and I have been experimenting with my hair and makeup. I changed to brown mascara like that Dressing Your Truth lady said I should, and I tried some of her very expensive products, so that I could look good.
I know that this is not about me, or my clothes and hair; it’s about the message. I just want to be a good messenger.
This is not my message; this is Heavenly Father’s message. He wants Some Secrets Hurt in every home where it can make a difference. He wants adults everywhere to teach kids about the sacredness of their bodies. He wants them to be able to stand up for themselves. He wants us to teach them how to say no. He wants us to stop abuse from happening so that his kids can heal. He wants us to stop the epidemic and be part of the solution. He wants us to reach out to teenagers who are at risk, and to wounded adults who don’t know how to heal.
I am honored to be a voice for children. I am not afraid to talk about sexual abuse. I am not nervous about teaching truth. I am excited to represent kids on T.V. I just want to look good, so that I can represent them well.
Hey, what are you doing later today? How about coming over and helping me figure out what to wear? We could experiment with my hair, and you could tell me if my new makeup looks orange. We could even talk about making a difference for kids.
Be sure to watch Studio 5 next Tuesday at 11:00 on KSL. If you can’t watch it, maybe you can record it. There is strength in numbers. Though we won’t be in the same room, I’m sure I’ll feel your strength. Together, we can make a difference.
Linda Garner
Wednesday, July 1, 2009
Maggie's T-Shirt
Great News! The first copies of Some Secrets Hurt are hot off the press. I hope to have one in my hands very soon. I have been told that they look great. Can’t wait to see them.
Thanks to everyone who responded to my t-shirt blog last week. I have pitched this idea to Shadow Mountain, but they have not responded. They are interested in seeing the feedback that is generated from my blog.
Sixty people viewed my blog last Tuesday. Fifteen responded. Four responded directly on the blogsite. Eleven responded to my personal email. Six people indicated that they would wear the t-shirt. Six people said they would buy the book, and didn’t say whether they would wear the t-shirt. Three people said they would not wear the t-shirt. One of those three intends to buy the book. The other two didn't say. Fourteen responders were female. One responder was male.
One person suggested a different idea for the t-shirt and said that Stand Up For Kids was too general. This person suggested a different caption and a different picture. Maggie is the main character in Some Secrets Hurt. In the book Maggie is being abused and she finds the courage to tell. The suggestion is to feature Maggie on the t-shirt and have the caption read Maggie Has a Secret and There is Only One Thing to Do. The back would read Maggie Must Tell. These are quotes from the book. As you might guess, this responder has seen the book.
No one sent their name to be included on the t-shirt. I must admit I am surprised. Since we would only use first names, I felt this would be totally non-threatening. I feel that we are offering abuse victims a chance to fight back in a safe environment.
I love the t-shirt idea. I think it would be great to have bookstore employees wear the shirt in August prior to the release of Some Secrets Hurt on September 16. The shirt could be given in drawings at presentations in schools and other settings. The shirt could also be sold in a variety of sizes, so that we all can send a message about ending abuse. One responder suggested that the t-shirt be a fitted one so that people who don’t find t-shirts flattering would enjoy wearing it.
Shadow Mountain isn’t sure about the t-shirt idea. Wait till they find out I have jewelry ideas too. I would love to see Maggie on necklaces, bracelets, and pins. We could all wear Maggie jewelry to remind us to stand up for kids and to have the courage to do what is right.
Maggie is my hero. She is an example to me of courage as she takes charge of her own body. She teaches adults to stand up for kids. She teaches kids to get help. She shows them that they can get better. Some Secrets Hurt is a story of healing. I know that Maggie will make a difference for kids of all ages.
The question is will we?
Linda Garner
Thanks to everyone who responded to my t-shirt blog last week. I have pitched this idea to Shadow Mountain, but they have not responded. They are interested in seeing the feedback that is generated from my blog.
Sixty people viewed my blog last Tuesday. Fifteen responded. Four responded directly on the blogsite. Eleven responded to my personal email. Six people indicated that they would wear the t-shirt. Six people said they would buy the book, and didn’t say whether they would wear the t-shirt. Three people said they would not wear the t-shirt. One of those three intends to buy the book. The other two didn't say. Fourteen responders were female. One responder was male.
One person suggested a different idea for the t-shirt and said that Stand Up For Kids was too general. This person suggested a different caption and a different picture. Maggie is the main character in Some Secrets Hurt. In the book Maggie is being abused and she finds the courage to tell. The suggestion is to feature Maggie on the t-shirt and have the caption read Maggie Has a Secret and There is Only One Thing to Do. The back would read Maggie Must Tell. These are quotes from the book. As you might guess, this responder has seen the book.
No one sent their name to be included on the t-shirt. I must admit I am surprised. Since we would only use first names, I felt this would be totally non-threatening. I feel that we are offering abuse victims a chance to fight back in a safe environment.
I love the t-shirt idea. I think it would be great to have bookstore employees wear the shirt in August prior to the release of Some Secrets Hurt on September 16. The shirt could be given in drawings at presentations in schools and other settings. The shirt could also be sold in a variety of sizes, so that we all can send a message about ending abuse. One responder suggested that the t-shirt be a fitted one so that people who don’t find t-shirts flattering would enjoy wearing it.
Shadow Mountain isn’t sure about the t-shirt idea. Wait till they find out I have jewelry ideas too. I would love to see Maggie on necklaces, bracelets, and pins. We could all wear Maggie jewelry to remind us to stand up for kids and to have the courage to do what is right.
Maggie is my hero. She is an example to me of courage as she takes charge of her own body. She teaches adults to stand up for kids. She teaches kids to get help. She shows them that they can get better. Some Secrets Hurt is a story of healing. I know that Maggie will make a difference for kids of all ages.
The question is will we?
Linda Garner
Tuesday, April 14, 2009
Just Like Christmas
It was just like Christ-mas. That darling fed ex man left a package on my door. I couldn’t wait to open it, because I knew what was inside. It was the galleys for my book, Some Secrets Hurt. Was it a stubborn package, or was I all thumbs? Friend Husband had to help me.My heart was dancing as we pulled out the beautiful pages and gazed at them in wonder. My dream is coming true. The artwork is lovely, the layouts are perfect, and the words are meaningful. The message is real and helpful. It is a message of hope and a message of healing. This project was inspired and I really cannot take the credit for it, but I am so grateful to have been included.
In my experience far too many lives have been damaged by sexual abuse. It is a rare family that has not experienced this heartbreaking betrayal of trust. It is time that a caring community steps up to the challenge and begins to put kids first.
According to the Parent Handbook distributed by the Salt Lake County Children’s Justice Center “Current statistics show that one out of every four girls and one out of every six boys will be sexually abused by the time they reach adulthood. People who sexually abuse children are rarely strangers to the child victim. In fact, the abuser is most often well known to the child (i.e. a relative, family friend, or neighbor). Abusers can be male or female; adult or juvenile; of any race, religion, or socio-economic status.”
If that doesn’t frighten you, you need to read it again.
Some Secrets Hurt is for everyone. It can be a child’s first instruction in avoiding the nightmare of sexual abuse. It can be a tool for a parent who wants to prevent sexual abuse. It provides information for a parent who has discovered sexual abuse and is unsure of the next step. It can strengthen a child who is experiencing sexual abuse, and help them find the courage to tell. It can promote comfort and healing for those who have unresolved issues relating to sexual abuse.
Who is Some Secrets Hurt for? Who is it not for? If you are a child, if you have a child, if you know a child, if you have been a child, Some Secrets Hurt is for you.
Some Secrets Hurt is being published by Shadow Mountain and will be released September 16. Every home should have one. My hope is that it will make a difference for children and families everywhere. Won’t you join me, and stand up now for our kids.
Linda Garner
P.S. My thanks to Brandilyn Speth, my talented friend and illustrator. Her illustrations are magic. You will love them. My thanks to all the wonderful people at Shadow Mountain who are making my dream come true. We would love to hear from you. Feel free to contact us: LindaGarner@somesecretshurt.com, Brandilyn@somesecretshurt.com Watch for our informative website: http://www.somesecretshurt.com/. Coming soon!
Tuesday, December 23, 2008
Let the Healing Begin
I received an early Christmas Gift last week. Brandilyn and I are delighted to announce that our book, Some Secrets Hurt, will be published next year. I cannot stop smiling. I can hardly think of anything else. I invite you to share our joy.
Our book will be published by Shadow Mountain. We anticipate an August release.
Brandilyn and I had a most delightful visit with Chris Schoebinger and Gail Halladay. Chris is the Children’s Book Director and Gail is the Marketing Director. They were completely gracious, and ever so kind and complimentary. They made us feel very special and important.
The most important news is that they love our book. They are excited about marketing it and they feel it will make a difference. That is exactly what we hope for. We have a sense of purpose as we reach out to protect and inform children. Our message will strengthen and empower children and parents.
We are astounded at the growing number of wounded children, who often become wounded adults. Our message to them is one of hope. We ache for them, and we send them our encouragement and love. We hope that our book will strengthen them as they move out of the shadows.
Let the healing begin.
Linda Garner
Our book will be published by Shadow Mountain. We anticipate an August release.
Brandilyn and I had a most delightful visit with Chris Schoebinger and Gail Halladay. Chris is the Children’s Book Director and Gail is the Marketing Director. They were completely gracious, and ever so kind and complimentary. They made us feel very special and important.
The most important news is that they love our book. They are excited about marketing it and they feel it will make a difference. That is exactly what we hope for. We have a sense of purpose as we reach out to protect and inform children. Our message will strengthen and empower children and parents.
We are astounded at the growing number of wounded children, who often become wounded adults. Our message to them is one of hope. We ache for them, and we send them our encouragement and love. We hope that our book will strengthen them as they move out of the shadows.
Let the healing begin.
Linda Garner
Tuesday, November 18, 2008
Children's Voices
I would like to preface today's post with my thanks to those of you who responded to last week’s post “Make a Difference.” Each of your responses was very meaningful to me. My publisher has invited me to share your responses with him, which I am delighted to do. It’s not too late to post your response. Just scroll down this page to the piece entitled Make a Difference and add your thoughts. If you prefer you can respond directly to me at can.u.make.a.difference@gmail.com. My publisher is moving forward, and I believe that my book will be published. Still, it’s not a done deal, and it may be that your response will make a difference.
My 9 year old grandson, Aaron, entered “The Write Stuff Thanksgiving Essay Contest,” a writing contest sponsored by Mimi’s Café. His teacher used the contest as a writing assignment. Aaron wrote some tender thoughts about his little sister and about modern medicine. Aaron is one of 15 finalists selected out of over 1200 entries. We are thrilled. Tomorrow he will read his essay at a special gathering at Mimi’s, where all writers will be honored and fed, and three winners will be awarded a $1,000 savings bond.
I would love to share Aaron’s essay with you. I will need to get his permission, and perhaps Mimi’s.
I am grateful to teachers like Aaron’s who nurture the creative voices of children and to organizations like Mimi’s who lend their support in such a big way. I am also grateful to both for nurturing gratitude, in a world that often emphasizes entitlement, and rewards greed. Encouraging young voices is a noble work. Encouraging gratitude is just as noble. I am thankful to those who taught me be thankful as well as those who encouraged me to write.
In honor of the Thanksgiving Holiday perhaps each of us can make a difference, by encouraging a young voice and planting the seeds of gratitude. Whether you are a parent, grandparent, teacher, brother, sister, or friend, you can make a difference in a young life today. Here are some ideas to get you thinking.
1. Gather magazines, scissors, paper, and glue, and allow kids to create a Thankful Collage. The collage can be on a flat piece of paper or it can be glued on a three dimensional object such as a box.
2. Use the child’s name to form a Gratitude Acronym. The child will write his name vertically on the page and then write down something for which he is thankful beginning with each of the letters. For example:
Library
Imagination
November
Dancing
Art
3. Help the child create a simple Thanksgiving Crossword pattern using their name as the basic structure. This is similar to the acronym except that the name letters can appear anywhere in the thankful words. Don’t worry about vertical lines, except for the name. For example:
my Life
spaghetti
angels
my bedroom
U.S.A.
The name letters L i n d a are supposed to line up vertically. In case it doesn't transfer well, I hope you get the idea. It's also fun to use your last name and get everyone involved.
4. Encourage a child to write a Thankful Poem. If he doesn’t know how to start give him a simple beginning and let him take it from there. Here are a couple of starting ideas.
Thank you for the good things that come to me each day.
Thanks for friends I see at school and friends who come to play.
Thanks for…
Or
I am thankful for the sun
And for each drop of rain
I am thankful I can run
…
Remember that poems don’t always have to rhyme either.
If the child can’t handle the writing, you can be a scribe, or you can create together. Feel free to post your poems on the blog, so that we can enjoy them too.
5. Help a child start a Gratitude Journal. Get a small notebook. At the end of each day the child will list 5 things he/she is grateful for. The list can be one word items or detailed sentences. Each day's list will be unique, according to the events of the day. This is such a great habit for kids and adults. I highly recommend it. It encourages us to look for the good things in our lives, and appreciate our blessings.
6. Encourage the child to think outside of the box. The Thankgiving Day box usually has 4 predictable sides; home, family, food & clothes, friends. Good things to be sure, but let’s encourage the kids to dig a little deeper and think of something a little more personal; a little more specific.
Recently I had this sort of talk with some kids. We talked about digging deeper and giving more personal answers. It was really fun to hear what they came up with. Some of the especially meaningful ones to me were music and hands. The music girl even named a specific song that had touched her life. What profound thoughts they stirred in my head as I realized how deeply grateful I am for these precious gifts in my life. When was the last time you thought to be grateful for your hands?
Today is a great day to be thankful. Today is a great day to encourage a young artist or writer. You can make a difference.
Linda Garner
My 9 year old grandson, Aaron, entered “The Write Stuff Thanksgiving Essay Contest,” a writing contest sponsored by Mimi’s Café. His teacher used the contest as a writing assignment. Aaron wrote some tender thoughts about his little sister and about modern medicine. Aaron is one of 15 finalists selected out of over 1200 entries. We are thrilled. Tomorrow he will read his essay at a special gathering at Mimi’s, where all writers will be honored and fed, and three winners will be awarded a $1,000 savings bond.
I would love to share Aaron’s essay with you. I will need to get his permission, and perhaps Mimi’s.
I am grateful to teachers like Aaron’s who nurture the creative voices of children and to organizations like Mimi’s who lend their support in such a big way. I am also grateful to both for nurturing gratitude, in a world that often emphasizes entitlement, and rewards greed. Encouraging young voices is a noble work. Encouraging gratitude is just as noble. I am thankful to those who taught me be thankful as well as those who encouraged me to write.
In honor of the Thanksgiving Holiday perhaps each of us can make a difference, by encouraging a young voice and planting the seeds of gratitude. Whether you are a parent, grandparent, teacher, brother, sister, or friend, you can make a difference in a young life today. Here are some ideas to get you thinking.
1. Gather magazines, scissors, paper, and glue, and allow kids to create a Thankful Collage. The collage can be on a flat piece of paper or it can be glued on a three dimensional object such as a box.
2. Use the child’s name to form a Gratitude Acronym. The child will write his name vertically on the page and then write down something for which he is thankful beginning with each of the letters. For example:
Library
Imagination
November
Dancing
Art
3. Help the child create a simple Thanksgiving Crossword pattern using their name as the basic structure. This is similar to the acronym except that the name letters can appear anywhere in the thankful words. Don’t worry about vertical lines, except for the name. For example:
my Life
spaghetti
angels
my bedroom
U.S.A.
The name letters L i n d a are supposed to line up vertically. In case it doesn't transfer well, I hope you get the idea. It's also fun to use your last name and get everyone involved.
4. Encourage a child to write a Thankful Poem. If he doesn’t know how to start give him a simple beginning and let him take it from there. Here are a couple of starting ideas.
Thank you for the good things that come to me each day.
Thanks for friends I see at school and friends who come to play.
Thanks for…
Or
I am thankful for the sun
And for each drop of rain
I am thankful I can run
…
Remember that poems don’t always have to rhyme either.
If the child can’t handle the writing, you can be a scribe, or you can create together. Feel free to post your poems on the blog, so that we can enjoy them too.
5. Help a child start a Gratitude Journal. Get a small notebook. At the end of each day the child will list 5 things he/she is grateful for. The list can be one word items or detailed sentences. Each day's list will be unique, according to the events of the day. This is such a great habit for kids and adults. I highly recommend it. It encourages us to look for the good things in our lives, and appreciate our blessings.
6. Encourage the child to think outside of the box. The Thankgiving Day box usually has 4 predictable sides; home, family, food & clothes, friends. Good things to be sure, but let’s encourage the kids to dig a little deeper and think of something a little more personal; a little more specific.
Recently I had this sort of talk with some kids. We talked about digging deeper and giving more personal answers. It was really fun to hear what they came up with. Some of the especially meaningful ones to me were music and hands. The music girl even named a specific song that had touched her life. What profound thoughts they stirred in my head as I realized how deeply grateful I am for these precious gifts in my life. When was the last time you thought to be grateful for your hands?
Today is a great day to be thankful. Today is a great day to encourage a young artist or writer. You can make a difference.
Linda Garner
Tuesday, November 11, 2008
Make a Difference
I love to write. You might say it is my passion. I love words. I love the sound of words. I love putting them together and listening for the music. In a way it’s like putting a puzzle together and making a word picture. I love the color and texture and shape of words. I like how they feel in my mouth and how they slide through the air and how they touch my heart.
It’s really fun when I get paid to write, but that isn’t what drives me. Part of it is the joy and the magic of words. I love how good writing draws people together. The other part is about having a voice, about making a difference. I guess its that part—the making a difference part—that draws me to topics that most intelligent writers would avoid.
About three years ago, I watched a TV talk show about sexual abuse of children and teenagers. Real kids with real stories were interviewed. I was horrified, and I was angry, and I began to write. What I wrote was a children’s story—a picture book—about sexual abuse. It is simple and direct. It speaks of solutions. It gives hope. It encourages children to speak up if they are being violated. It encourages parents and other responsible adults to be watchful. It tells parents what to look for and what to do if the unthinkable is happening to someone they love.
Just as I finished writing my book, I met a gifted artist, named Brandilyn Speth, who shared my passion for making a difference. She was excited about adding her voice to mine in the form of illustrations. I love the clarity that her work brought to my words. Early this spring we felt that it was time to test the market. Because we were dealing with a very sensitive issue, we knew that many publishers would not be comfortable with our book. Thinking of the destructive nature of sexual abuse gave us courage. Wanting to make a difference for children who are being hurt and families that are aching for support and solutions, we decided to move forward.
In early April we sent our manuscript to a carefully chosen publisher. Our manuscript got good reviews. It is being considered for publication. The children’s book director likes the book. He likes the illustrations. He knows there is a need. However, he is concerned about the numbers. How many copies can he sell? I understand his concern. He needs to make a profit. I need to make a difference.
My would-be publisher calls this a “niche” book; meaning that he doesn’t expect it to sell many copies. It fits a small “niche” of the public. I, on the other hand, feel that abuse is rampant and that there is hardly any corner of the earth that has not been touched by sexual abuse. I imagine my book flying off the shelves and into the hands and homes of children who need its message.
Does it surprise you to know that more than 1,100 cases of child sexual abuse are reported everyday? This translates to more than 400,000 cases each year. Ongoing studies continually confirm that 1 in 4 girls and 1 in 7 boys will be sexually molested before the age of 18. Additionally some studies have shown that only 10% of sexually abused children are molested by strangers. One survey showed that "... 50% to 80% of child sexual abuse victims are abused by people they know.”
Clearly we need answers, and we need them now. Children need to be taught that they have rights, that they can say no, and that they can get help. Parents need to know what to watch for and how to respond in a crisis. Both need to know that they are not alone and that they can get help. Our book doesn’t have all the answers but it is a good starting place.
If you think sexual abuse of children is a big deal, I would love to hear from you. Do you see sexual abuse of children as a main stream problem? Is there someone close to you who has been damaged by sexual abuse? How interested would you be in a well written book that addresses this sensitive issue? Would you buy a book like this for yourself? For someone you love? Would you buy it is a gift? Would you buy it only if you were in the midst of a crisis, or would you buy it as preventative education? Feel free to respond anonymously, if that is more comfortable for you. You can also respond to can.u.make.a.difference@gmail.com.
When people ask me questions about my book, they often want to know what age it is written for. My usual response is, “What age is it not written for?” You see, children of every age have been sexually abused. Babies are not exempt, nor are teenagers, or the handicapped, or elderly. Boys as well as girls are sexually abused. Adult men and women may carry scars from childhood sexual abuse, that never fully healed. Our book is simple enough for a parent to read to a young child, yet profound enough to influence a teenager, informative enough to provide help to a troubled parent, and powerful enough to reach out to a wounded adult.
Linda Garner
It’s really fun when I get paid to write, but that isn’t what drives me. Part of it is the joy and the magic of words. I love how good writing draws people together. The other part is about having a voice, about making a difference. I guess its that part—the making a difference part—that draws me to topics that most intelligent writers would avoid.
About three years ago, I watched a TV talk show about sexual abuse of children and teenagers. Real kids with real stories were interviewed. I was horrified, and I was angry, and I began to write. What I wrote was a children’s story—a picture book—about sexual abuse. It is simple and direct. It speaks of solutions. It gives hope. It encourages children to speak up if they are being violated. It encourages parents and other responsible adults to be watchful. It tells parents what to look for and what to do if the unthinkable is happening to someone they love.
Just as I finished writing my book, I met a gifted artist, named Brandilyn Speth, who shared my passion for making a difference. She was excited about adding her voice to mine in the form of illustrations. I love the clarity that her work brought to my words. Early this spring we felt that it was time to test the market. Because we were dealing with a very sensitive issue, we knew that many publishers would not be comfortable with our book. Thinking of the destructive nature of sexual abuse gave us courage. Wanting to make a difference for children who are being hurt and families that are aching for support and solutions, we decided to move forward.
In early April we sent our manuscript to a carefully chosen publisher. Our manuscript got good reviews. It is being considered for publication. The children’s book director likes the book. He likes the illustrations. He knows there is a need. However, he is concerned about the numbers. How many copies can he sell? I understand his concern. He needs to make a profit. I need to make a difference.
My would-be publisher calls this a “niche” book; meaning that he doesn’t expect it to sell many copies. It fits a small “niche” of the public. I, on the other hand, feel that abuse is rampant and that there is hardly any corner of the earth that has not been touched by sexual abuse. I imagine my book flying off the shelves and into the hands and homes of children who need its message.
Does it surprise you to know that more than 1,100 cases of child sexual abuse are reported everyday? This translates to more than 400,000 cases each year. Ongoing studies continually confirm that 1 in 4 girls and 1 in 7 boys will be sexually molested before the age of 18. Additionally some studies have shown that only 10% of sexually abused children are molested by strangers. One survey showed that "... 50% to 80% of child sexual abuse victims are abused by people they know.”
Clearly we need answers, and we need them now. Children need to be taught that they have rights, that they can say no, and that they can get help. Parents need to know what to watch for and how to respond in a crisis. Both need to know that they are not alone and that they can get help. Our book doesn’t have all the answers but it is a good starting place.
If you think sexual abuse of children is a big deal, I would love to hear from you. Do you see sexual abuse of children as a main stream problem? Is there someone close to you who has been damaged by sexual abuse? How interested would you be in a well written book that addresses this sensitive issue? Would you buy a book like this for yourself? For someone you love? Would you buy it is a gift? Would you buy it only if you were in the midst of a crisis, or would you buy it as preventative education? Feel free to respond anonymously, if that is more comfortable for you. You can also respond to can.u.make.a.difference@gmail.com.
When people ask me questions about my book, they often want to know what age it is written for. My usual response is, “What age is it not written for?” You see, children of every age have been sexually abused. Babies are not exempt, nor are teenagers, or the handicapped, or elderly. Boys as well as girls are sexually abused. Adult men and women may carry scars from childhood sexual abuse, that never fully healed. Our book is simple enough for a parent to read to a young child, yet profound enough to influence a teenager, informative enough to provide help to a troubled parent, and powerful enough to reach out to a wounded adult.
Linda Garner
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